"Hindi naman ako ganoon ka-busy so.." I shrugged. May dance studio kasi malapit sa condo ko at nag enroll ako doon. I want to dance again. Para rin may libangan ako.
"You should've not quit ballet," Eli told me. Magkasama kami ngayon dahil sumakto na pareho kaming walang klase ngayon. "Pero mabuti nga at bumalik ka na sa pagsayaw." she added.
It's been a month na rin. Nakapag-adjust naman na ako sa time ko. It wasn't easy pero kailangan kayanin. Mahirap tumira mag-isa pero ayos lang, mas okay ako na mag isa. My course is hard, well, studying is really hard for me. Hindi rin ako madalas umuwi ng Laguna. If it's not important, I won't go home. Kaya si Daddy mismo ang napunta dito sa condo ko para bisitahin ako at tingnan kung may kailangan ako.
I don't ask him for anything, kusa siyang nagbibigay. I don't ask a lot for allowance, hinihintay ko na siya mismo ang magbigay. Pati I'm saving money pero minsan talaga sunod-sunod ang night out namin. Well, I don't always pay for our drinks. Mostly, si Tom at Xhenlai ang nagbabayad.
"Sabay tayong umuwi," sabi ko kay Eli. "Wala akong dalang sasakyan, e." Nag-commute lang ako kanina dahil tinamad akong mag-drive.
"Okay. Hindi ka ba susunduin ni Troy?" she asked.
Umiling ako. "We're not talking anymore. Last week pa." sabi ko.
We ended it. Wala nang thrill, e. Pati it's just a fling. Pareho naman kaming hindi seryoso. Wala pa akong nahahanap na bago. Wala pa ako sa mood ulit lumandi.
"Bakit kasi hindi ka pa mag-seryoso?" tanong ni Eli. "You're not going to play around forever, Jenwel."
I sighed. "Hindi ko alam kung kaya ko... I don't know how to love." sagot ko sa kanya.
It's true. Hindi ko alam kung paano magmahal dahil hindi ko naman ito naranasan. Siguro ay marunong ako dahil naranasan ko na rin naman na pumasok sa isang relasyon pero pakiramdam ko hindi iyon pagmamahal dahil.. hindi naman kami nagtagal. And I don't want to love or be in love. I can't see myself falling in love with someone again. Ayokong magkaroon ng kahinaan. Love will make us weak and I don't want that. I promised myself that the pain I experienced when my ex left me, will be the last.
I don't want to be close to anyone anymore. I don't want to be attached to someone anymore.
"Here's your order, Ma'am." ngumiti sa akin yung babaeng nag-serve.
Ngumiti ako pabalik. "Thank you,"
I was enjoying my coffee and aqdmiring the view of the buildings outside when someone caught my attention. The man is sitting in front of me. Isang table lang ang pagitan namin. He's busy taking notes habang may laptop din sa harapan niya. I don't know how long I was staring at him.
Nakatitig lang ako sa kanya. I don't know.. there's something in him, e. Am I interested in him? But.. he said he doesn't also have time for serious relationships. Dahil ba focus din siya sa pag-aaral niya? Maybe.
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BINABASA MO ANG
He Stole My Heart (Heart Series #3)
RomanceSelfish, harsh, and rude. That's how Jenwel's family describe her. Her past mistakes, bad reputation, and the impulsive decisions she made in the past, are the only things that her family sees. A good heart but never been seen. Craving for time, lov...