Investigating on the Air

On the Air

"Hello listeners! It's your host Alastor and with me is my cohost Mic!"

"'How's it going, you sad sacks?"

"That's enough of that."

"Whateva' ya say 'Boss'."

"Listen here you little troll, I don't know what it is but now is not the time."

"Ya' forget that I'm fractured part of your psyche, right?"

"Fractured is what you're going to be in a few minutes if you don't shape up."

You know, their voices were quite cheerful despite the contents of the conversation.

"Anyway, today will be open for questions. so ask away."

"Hello, listener, you're on the air."

"Yes, hello, I wanted to ask how you felt about the new series by Vox and Velvet."

"Series?"

"Yes, you know, the one where they talk about you."

"Really? And what do they say?" He sounded so uninterested.

"Well, they talk about how they wish to bed you."

"Oh." This wasn't anything he hadn't heard before.

"Would you like to hear an audio clip?"

"Sure, why not?"

"Here it is."

*"Imagine his voice at a higher frequency as I ram him into-"*

There was a sharp screech of static.

"And here is another one."

*"There has to be a way to impregnate a man in hell."

"He would make a great mother."

. . . .

"Fuck, I'm ready to have a go at this man."*

The static continued for a bit before it stopped.

"There is so much wrong with that. While I do find children amusing, I have no desire for one currently." He sounded so tired.

"Okay."

This entire time Mic was just cackling in the background.

"Shut it, you troll."

"Well that's it for now folks'!"