The Guardian's Path

Chapter 7 - Spiraling

It may have been years since Custos was a Jedi, but some habits can never be broken. Even now, even as a Sith, he still tries to meditate every morning, though he's now focusing more on embracing the Dark Side and exploring the Force than he is on finding "calm." Peace is a lie; there is only passion. He might not care much for the Sith Code as a whole, but that line is truth. Besides, he finds it exceedingly difficult to not feel passionate about Ani. The boy somehow stole his entire heart, and he wouldn't have it any other way.

In another lifetime, if he'd made a different choice, Custos knows that he might have ended up marrying Duchess Satine Kryze of Mandalore and having children with her, but... he doesn't want that life anymore, because it would have meant never meeting Ani. His children with Satine would have been his children by blood, but Ani is his son by choice and by Force. The bond that binds them is unbreakable, or so he hopes. He would lose himself entirely if he ever lost his child, either of his children.

There's something so incredibly touching and intimate about the way they look at him, blue eyes filled with unwavering trust, loyalty, and adoration. It's especially true for Anakin. Even if Custos has only known him for a day, he feels as if he's known him for years. Anakin is passionate, loyal to the end, impulsive, intense. He's special. Custos never thought it possible to love anyone as deeply as he does Anakin and Ani. They are his everything, and there's nothing he wouldn't do to keep his sons safe and happy. If only it was within his power to do so.

He doesn't deserve to have Anakin – either one – love him so deeply. They deserve so much better than the life he has to offer to them, and yet, for some reason, they don't care. Ani wouldn't leave his side willingly if he was given a choice. And Anakin... Custos already knows that the elder wants to stay with him; he wants to keep him close along with Obi-Wan. It's fine. He understands that the bond Anakin shares with Obi-Wan is not one he can forget easily, much less move past. Anakin needs both of them, and hopefully, Custos' arrest won't force him to take a side. Custos wouldn't want to be the reason Anakin abandoned his former master for someone else, especially not when it would be a decision that would forever haunt him.

He might not like the sway Obi-Wan has over the Anakin, the way that he selfishly treats him, castigating him for his emotions, holding him at arms-length, but he still accepts that Anakin's attachment will never go away. At the same time, Custos knows that Anakin needs time to sort out his head; he needs time to become a person away from Obi-Wan's shadow. Perhaps he's being cynical, but Custos doesn't think that Obi-Wan will change. He's too old, too set in the Jedi's ways. It depends on whether his love for Anakin is greater than his love for himself and the Order.

Putting aside his thoughts, Custos lets himself drift into the Force. He's in a Force-dampening cell which means he can't reach outwards, but he can reach inwards. He can still feel the Force humming through him, the Dark Side curling around him, heeding his beck and call. Images drift into his mind, and he lets them come, the darkness sweeping through him.

Sidious' face, cast in shadows, appears in his mind's eye, a dark, sinister grin on his face, yellow eyes glowing. He looks much like Custos remembers in their final duel, except older somehow. "You lost," he mocks, throwing out a hand, and Custos sees Anakin – it's not Ani; he knows it – on his knees, head bowed, almost invisible chains wrapped around him. "You will not take him from me, from his destiny."

Custos sucks in a sharp breath, awareness snapping back to the present. That has never happened before. Ani is prone to having visions, but he's never shared that propensity, and it's never been like that. It is true that the Dark Side gives additional clarity, and perhaps his new connection to Anakin has granted him the ability to see beyond the Veil of the Dark Side. Sidious is... alive? Trying to turn Anakin?