Trust no one: It gets weirder from here

The author

Today our story begins before the beginning with the past 30 years prier with the original mystery twins Stan and Stan starting off Mabel and Dipper's age or close to it. Stan and Ford are on Glass Shard Beach looking into a boarded up cave as the twins look for mystery. It's a good thing you've got your smarts Poindexter but I've got that other thing. What's it called? Oh yeah punch! Stan says breaking the boards after Ford's failed attempt at breaking them.

It's kind of creepy in here. Ford says. Don't worry bro no matter what we do or where we go we'll always do it together. Stan tells his brother. Let's write our names on the wall so that everyone knows who owns this place. Stan says as they do exactly that. And then it flashes back the present.

Finally after all these years of waiting you're finally here brother! Stan says happy. But Ford punches him in the face. Ow hey what was that for?! That was an extremely risky move restarting the portal like that! What were you thinking? Didn't you read my warnings?! Ford asks. And to top it off first the last 30 years and then 8 years ago and the miracle this summer. When Farrah came in and out.

The portal hasn't been fully restored for the last 30 years and the last 8 of them you weren't being responsible as the usual letting an 8 year old play down there. Don't you know how dangerous it is down here? You should know after what you did 30 years ago! How about a thank you?! Stan asked him. And for what I?! Ok, for one I found her down here after I warned her it was dangerous but I was too late to save her. But some uncle you are she was with you probably for the last 8 years and you left her alone!

Who knows what happened to her when she got sucked up into that portal? I know she had some training with her powers. But that we both know that she's originally from the nightmare realm, the realm she would've lived in if her boyfriend hadn't found her in time by the time she was about 8 years old before she disappeared. The realm she and her mother are from and you know that. You think I'm not responsible? That I can't be strong and smart?!

Your oldest niece is supposed to be a demon siren queen and evil ruling over the dark world with Bill Cipher as her evil prince! That she'll be queen when she turns 18, that she tries to get rid of a letter that she was never supposed to have or know about. I've been responsible for her for as long as I can remember. But don't expect me to go easy on you just because you're family! He takes a swing at Ford and misses and Ford knocks him the ground.

Hi Mabel Pines here and can I just ask one thing.... What is going on here?! Stan you didn't tell me that there were children present or that Farrah was here! He exclaims. Who are these people? They're your niece and nephew Poindexter our other brother's grand kinds. And that's her boyfriend Jack Frost and her own good Bill named Will he's blue instead of yellow and he's of her own creation. He's her best friend and they've both grown on me.

Greetings everybody. Do kids still say that? I haven't been in this world for a long time. He shakes hands with Mabel who is impressed with his six fingered handshake. A finger even friendlier than a normal handshake. She exclaims. I like this kid she's weird. You're the author of the journals? Dipper asks him. You've read my journals? Read them I've lived them! I also may or may not have my own "journal" hidden under my floorboards near the floorboard I also keep my Bill's deposable body there as well. I mentioned.

Her I like, and I see your powers have gotten stronger over the last 8 years now that your 16 going on 17 in October. Am I right? Yes Grunkle Ford. I nod at him. So, I still have about a year before that time but she comes and goes and talks to me in my reflection even though I really don't have one unless she shows up and then tries to break me down and get into my head. But Blue Bill is good because I'm not evil but like you Stanford Bill was a friend of mine before I realized he was evil. Taught me everything I knew. Not very thrilled especially with the idea that GIFfany my evil servant tried to make our friend Soos her boyfriend and tried to get Bill and I to be evil and come back with her to our nightmare realm.

Well, there will of course be more time for more introductions later on but for now first tell me Farrah, Stan does anyone else know about this portal? Us and possibly the US Government. Stan tells him. At this Ford freaks out, but he's not worried yet because he thinks they'll have a hard time finding the room we're in but the agents are seen on screen and they are determined to find where we are. For myself, for my friends, for Stan and to take my siblings away from us.

Since we knew we would be down here for a while until he had a plan or until they found us. That it was suggested that we tell mysterious back stories which means that Stan had a lot to explain because he was also going by the other Stan's full name and Ford was upset about that so Stan explained what his childhood was like. Back in 1960 something....

I lived with my ma and pa in the Lead Paint District in the family pawn shop. He told us about how strict his father was and how he wasn't easily impressed. And it turned out his mother was a pathological liar. Which is probably where Stan got his lying abilities from. And then he started talking about Stanford and what a nerd he was and his birth defect of having 6 fingers.

Just like how your sister was born with powers but didn't have training with them really until she met Bill after she went into the portal. She's born to be evil, just like your mother was once evil as well until she fell in love with your father. Well your grandparents didn't like that. Farrah you've watched Beautiful Creatures? Yes sir. How the main character was supposed to be evil by her next birthday but she blocked the moon and changed her fate even though she gave up the love of her life. Just like you she wanted to distance herself from her loved ones so that they wouldn't get hurt.

But you have proved time and time again that your powers aren't evil as long as you don't use them like it. No one has power over you, not your true form or your grandfather or your servant or evil Bill because Jack and Blue Bill will be sure of it. And you mark your journal with an infinity sign and that's a symbol of yours the same way my brother marks his with his 6 fingers. But as different as the two of us were my brother had brains but I had what my mom called personality. But we were always together and always found adventure together and we were the perfect team.

Much like your brother and sister or you and your friends. Your siblings are just like my brother and I with some differences and you and your friends well Jack is from this world and you and the two Bills are from the nightmare realm but you created yours to be good but you are more like my brother minus the nerdy part of you your brother is all the nerd we need for your part of the family. No offense. But we need more creative people in this cruel world and that's where you and your friends and your sister come in. But you know as I was saying in the world of story telling.... A shipwrecked sailboat, possibly haunted by pirate ghosts!