A Player's Love

Chapter One

* Flashback *

"How could you do this to me?"she reluctantly asked with tears running amok down her burning cheeks.

"And you, you are supposed to be my friend", she blurted out.

It was like the walls were closing in and her breathing became shallow.

How could this be, her fiancé and her best friend?

How could they do this to her?

"Crystal I can adequately explain," Jason typically said.

"What Jason?" she shouted, anger directly consuming her. "How do you explain sleeping with my best friend?"

Was she so blind to not have observed the signs? How could she be so stupid to not see what was happening right under her nose? They were always close hanging around each other. But, she never thought anything of it because in her mind they are supposed to be friends, her best friend and her boyfriend.

"Crystal..." Amanda said, hauling her out of her thoughts. She didn't realize Amanda had gotten up off the bed and was standing next to her.

She took a step back, not wanting to be so close to her.

"Cris" she said grimly using her affectionate nickname "I am desperately ashamed. I never expected you to find out like this."

"Mandy, don't," Jason exclaimed eagerly.

"No Jason, she undoubtedly deserves to know the ultimate truth. I cannot do this anymore," she shouted, "we can't undoubtedly keep doing this. Intentionally hiding how we naturally feel about each other."

Crystal was appalled by what was undoubtedly taking place right before her eyes. How long has this been going on? How long have they been secretly seeing each other? So many pertinent questions swirled around her giddy head.

"How long?" was precisely all she could have mustered.

They both directed their attention to her.

Jason spoke first "Cris babe" instantly reaching for her.

She stepped back cautiously raising her nervous hands. "Don't," she said shakily, "just don't, please. Just tell me how long?"

"Six months," Amanda said carefully.

Her teary sunken eyes widen in paralyzing shock...how could this be happening? She needed getting out of there, she could hardly breathe.

"Why?"was all she could say. She didn't trust herself to merely speak.

They both looked at each other. "Babe," Jason begins to say but stop short when he saw the daggers Crystal were throwing with her eyes.

"Crystal," he continued."You know damned I scarcely care about you and always will." He wistfully sighed dragging his eager hands across his wry face. "I've been in love with Amanda for considerably quite awhile now. You are a nice girl and all, but I don't feel the attraction for you the way I feel about her."

She just stood there, tears running down her plump cheek. Her conscious mind promptly filing through her conscious memories, eagerly trying to figure out where she went wrong. How could she not have seen this all along? The late nights, undoubtedly working on specific projects and imminent deadlines my ass.

"Cris you have to understand this was unintentional, it just happened," Amanda said promptly pulling her from her unpleasant thoughts.

"Six months? Jason, you proposed to me two months ago...Why?" she shouted. "You have been fucking her for six damn months but to chose to merely propose knowing damn well I would say yes."

Why didn't they just tell her, she typically thought. Why did they have to intentionally let it come to this?

"You are both pretenders, and I never want to see you again," she whispered fiercely.

Amanda reached out for her but she unanimously backed away shaking her head.

"Cris, I never meant to willingly hurt you," Jason said coming cautiously to her side. "We wanted to tell you but we didn't know how to make you understand without hurting you."

She almost laughed, "so you were planning on marrying me while still secretly screwing by best friend", she huffed.

"You know what..." she gently waved her hands "why am I even bothering myself with you two? You say you love me and didn't want to hurt me?" she laughed. "You guys are pathetic and I never want to see or speak to you ever again."

She turned and walked out slamming the door behind her but not before saying sarcastically "I wish you both a happy life." With enough venom on her eloquent tongue to succinctly put a cobra to shame.

* The Present *

I woke up with a freight, wiping sweat from my brow.

It has been one year and even though I've put it all behind me, still the memory of that dreadful afternoon still makes me feel sad.

My name is Crystal Lewis, and I am 24 years of age. I wasn't your average 5 ft 5 inches kind of girl. I was almost 6 feet tall standing at 5 feet 10 inches. I wasn't slim and I wasn't fat either. I like thinking of myself as being equally proportioned. I have the face of a Disney princess, but I was as black as they come.

One year ago today, I discovered my best friend and my boyfriend had been sleeping together. They claimed they were in love. But that wasn't the hard part.

The hard part was we were engaged to be married, and he proposed three months after he started sleeping with her.

It's messed up, I know.

You know what's even weirder, today was the date set for me to walk down the aisle. Maybe that's why selective memories of them steeped through my conscious mind after intentionally blocking them for so long and moving on with my independent life.

I gently stretched, naturally hearing my lazy bones cracked. I didn't want to voluntarily leave the luxurious comfort of my bed. This affordable apartment had efficiently been my haven after I moved out of the apartment I shared with Amanda. I was going missing this place. Even though it was a rundown building and the buzzing noise of the busy New Kingston night life kept me awake most nights, I was grateful to have a roof over my head. Besides it was all I could reasonably afford on my meager salary.

I sluggishly rolled out of my comfortable bed, knowing I had to prepare myself without a doubt.

I had a flight to catch. I signed up for the work program right after I triumphantly finished my studies at the University of Technology. I graduated with a Bachelors Degree in Hospitality and Tourism Management. The original plan was going to get a job with one of Jamaica's finest hotels but after what happened I decided to charter a new course.

It was time for me to put the past where it belongs, and that was in the past. A new beginning was waiting for me, and I cannot let the opportunity to cease the moment pass me by, just sitting around wallowing in my sorrow thinking about what could have been.

I showered and prepared for my flight, dressed in black skinny jeans, a long-sleeve Old Navy shirt, and black boots. While my destination lacked snow, I had a connecting flight through New York, where heavy snow was possible in the afternoon. Therefore, I packed a sweater and a sturdy coat as a precautionary measure.

I carefully looked in the mirror one last time and I typically saw a strong black woman about to venture into the unknown. I don't know what is waiting for me out there, but it was a risk I was willing to take. This was the first essential step towards finding myself and living for me.

It's prime time to move on full speed ahead...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Whew...I finally got through the first chapter.

Sincerely hope it wasn't too long...