Unlovable Me {BoyxBoy}

Chapter 3

School finished earlier than it was meant to but that didn't bother me in the slightest, rather it made me somewhat happy. Problem was half of my classes I was with my mate, Taylor. He didn't stop staring at me, he looked to be in thought. His eyes never strayed a centimeter away from me not even for a second.

My pace fastened as I clutched at my bag, leaving the school grounds. The itch to do something to my wrist pricked at the back of my mind. I know I should be happy that I found my mate but the anxiety grew, that caused the voices to grow louder with each passing moment.

Usually if school finished early I might visit my favourite café or go for a run but right now I wanted to go home even if father was there waiting to beat the shit out of me. As I arrive at home relief washes over my body like a wave washing a little anxiety. My father's car wasn't in the driveway meaning one thing he's still at work. It's actually amazing he hasn't been fired, even though he goes to work high or drunk and comes back the same way.

Entering the house, I lock it behind me and run upstairs, tripping and falling a few times.

'Cut yourself, geez you're so useless. You can't even get into the house without falling and hurting yourself. You're worthless, death should knock at your door soon because I don't know how long this will continue from the way you're going at this rate even my voice won't kill you, you'll end up killing yourself without me. Your mate will probably reject you, your white hair is disgusting.'

[TW: Self-Harm]

I slam the door behind me and fall to the ground onto my knees. I pull out a loose floor board and feel around underneath, a prick on my finger knows I have what I need in my hand. I pull out the sharp razor, blood stains from previous episodes staining the silver. My heart hammered in my chest like drums as I moved into the bathroom and sat on the floor, leaning against the bathtub. I hold my wrist over the tub and gently place the razor near my veins on my wrist. Slowly I glide the sharp razor along my skin, watching as a trail of blood seeps through my cut skin.

The sting that was brought after sent shivers down my spine.

One cut "Useless"

Two cuts "Worthless"

Three cuts "Kill Yourself"

Four cuts "Freak"

Five cuts "Wimp"

Six cuts "Waste of Space"

Seven cuts "Whore"

Eight cuts "Dumbass"

Nine cuts "Failure"

And the tenth cut "You should just die, nobody cares."

The red crimson liquid ran down my arm into the bath tub. Black spots invaded my vision and my body began to grow weak. Suddenly the door downstairs slams open instead of two steps four steps sound throughout the house.

'Must have brought home another slut to fuck all day' quickly I hide the razor under the floor board and take out a bandage from under the bathroom sink and wrap it around my wrist.

The door to my room slams open, revealing my father and a female with blonde locks behind him clinging to his arm. She'll be used then thrown away tomorrow morning like every other girl he's brought over what makes her any different. A sadistic smile taints his lips as he throws me to the ground and kicks me right into my guts. His foot collides with my ribs, a sickening sound fills my ears. He walks away while the female laughs walking away, walking out of my room and going towards my dad's room next door. After a few minutes laying on the ground holding my sore ribs, moans fill the room coming from next door.