Drown by her mystic rhythms (Sapience Series)

Chapter 26

It's been two weeks since Aren took care of me, and it's true what he said after that day i wont see him anymore, even his fucking shadow i can't see anymore, i can't even feel his presence to this fucking world. 

Isn't this what i want? I can't see him anymore, but it's so bullshit that no matter what i do, i still want to see him. I don't  feel like my heart is complete anymore, I left half of my heart with him, or it's just been destroyed since we broke up.

nandito ako ngayon sa bahay nila mommy at mamaya at balak ko ng bumalik sa condo siguro naman kaya ko na, though alam kong bubungad sakin ang memories namin doon pero hindi pwedeng habang buhay nalang akong ganito, oo masakit padin, nasasaktan pa rin ako pero kailangan kong lumaban. I did not break up with him for no reason, we need to grow individually.

"anak, lets talk" mommy called me and tapped the sofa to tell me to sit next to her, and i followed her, i sat next to her.

"how are you anak?" my mom asked. "i know you're still hurting but i know you can handle it, you're a strong girl" mommy caressed my back.

"thank you po" i smiled at mommy sparingly.

"elise, do you want to pursue your college in the U.S? For somehow that you feel better, that is also for you" my eyes widened at what mommy said. It's still 2 years before i can graduate, its too early for me to left them here. But as for mommy said it would also be better for me. 

"pero ayoko pa pong mapalayo sainyo"  nangingilid nanaman ang mga luha sa mga mata ko.

"we can call each other anak, hindi naman namin ipaparamdam sayo na mag isa ka don" mom smiled at me. I just nodded to her.

"kailan po?" tumingin ako kay mommy at nakita ko sa mga mata niya ang pag aalala.

"after this school year? Are you sure? Im just telling you this pwede mong tanggihan kung ayaw mo or if you're not ready yet" mom squeezed my hands.

"im sure na po, ill go there for you. I want to graduate and give the life that you deserve" i smiled at mommy and she also smiled at me. 

"dont pressure yourself too much okay? When you go there please take care of yourself" i saw the concern in mommy's eyes. Ill miss her so much, ill miss them. him.

                                                                                                               ^^^

"bakit ang aga naman ata ng alis mo girl?" kunot noong tanong ni elle. 

"i need peace of mind" i chuckled.

"gusto mo lang maka move-" hindi natuloy ni deo ang sasabihin niya ng batukan siya aki. here we go again. ill miss this bond.

"shut the fuck up, kung wala kang matinong sasabihin manahimik ka nalang. Sino ba kasi nagsama sa lalaking to" galit na sabi  ni aki.

"girl calm down, im also going there to move on" yumuko ako at ngumiti ng tipid. 

"oh di'ba, nananakit kaagad eh. Tama naman ako" problemadong sabi ni deo habang hinihimas ang batok niya dahil medyo malakas ang batok ni aki.

"tama o mali babatukan pa din kita" inirapan ni aki si deo. 

"sure ka na ba talaga?" nag aalalang nakatingin sakin si avine. Kaya tumango nalang ako, sure na ako. Kaya ko naman hindi ba?