June 23, 1976
It's been a while since I've seen Sirius.
What more can I say or do?
He doesn't wish to see me and I completely respect that, it's his choice, but I'm still uneasy. Some choices don't always make complete sense until something else is explained.
"What more can I even do?" I rant to Peter and Remus in my room again. "Potter has been with Sirius every second of the day and the two of you have seen him, but me? Why am I so attached to that fact?" I sigh, falling down on my back onto the bed.
"You just care too much." Remus concludes from the chair at my desk, looking up from his book. "Now that we have solved that puzzle, could you answer the phone? The continuous ringing is bothering me."
"You should speak to him now El... There's no use trying to prolong it." Peter tells me from the end of my bed where all our seating has been designated from yesterday, soon being interrupted by the ringing of the phone.
"Fine." I groan. "Get out of my room you two." I chuckle as I usher them out of the room and go to my phone. Just as I do so, it magically rings on cue like he has been expecting me.
"What did I do?" He immediately questions once I answer.
"What are you talking about?"
"I know something happened... You haven't called for days since we last spoke."
"I'm sorry, a lot of things have been happening and I just got so busy."
"Oh... Really?" He asks in disbelief.
"Yeah, but I have to be honest Evan. I need to say something." I hesitantly confess.
"What is it?" He innocently asks, not expecting what I'm about to say, at least I didn't think so.
"I think we need to break up.."
"You think?" He harshly repeats.
"I know we do."
"Why? I don't know what I did, but I'll fix whatever it is... just don't do this to me Elly. Not when I can't see you... please."
"I can't be in a relationship where it feels like a contract."
"What are you saying?"
"Evan... I can't hurt you by continuing this relationship. I can't do this to you. I care for you Evan, I really do." I sigh. "But I don't think we're fit to be in a relationship with one another. We would be better off being friends."
We continue to go around and around in circles, one word after another. He basically refuses to listen until an unexpected phrase comes out of his mouth.
"Who is it?"
"What are you asking?"
"Who is making you do this, because I promise you, I'll make sure they don't do this to you ever again."
"Evan, you're not hearing me."
"I clearly am, how else can I talk back to you." He scoffs.
"Merlin..."
"Tell me why exactly."
"Truth be told, when I speak to you... I feel like I'm speaking to a brick wall half of the time. You've been an amazing friend, but when we got together, you became a new person. It was like you were hiding who you were this whole time and when I was with you, you started doing things that I never knew you would."
"That's bloody ridiculous." He scoffs again.
"No matter how oblivious you might think I am, I notice things Evan. I notice when you doze off every time I try to speak to you. I notice when you hang out with people you swore on your life you never would. And I notice when you lie."
YOU ARE READING
Beyond Hope
Fanfiction(On hold) This is my story. My name is Elpis L. LaBelle. Everything written in here is my story. Don't read it before July 31, 1998. As Sirius would like to say, siriusly. The contents of this journal is to remain only between those who have read it...
