Harry Styles Do Be A Potter

Chapter 28: Fool's Gold

    Ni had been walking the streets of diagon alley for what seemed like hours. She looked up at the sunless sky, oh, it has been hours! She'd stopped at all the shops for upcoming Hogwarts students, even at all the restaurants.

    I could use a drink, she thought. Wizards could drink alcohol at 17 legally for some reason.

    She walked into the nearest club, which happened to be a strip club, her tired feet screaming at her. She made eye contact with the bouncer and winked.

    "Ni? I'm a huge fan of This Town" said the bouncer. "As well as your charity for house elf liberation. An inspiration, truly."

    Ni beamed, her heart full. "Thank you so much"

    The bouncer reached into her bra and pulled out a headshot of Ni, and unfolded it gently with love and care. "Can you sign this?"

    Ni pulled a sharpie out of her bra. "Sure thing. What's your name love?"

    The bouncer blushed, "Millie Bobby Brown."

    Ni quickly signed the headshot, filling it with cute hearts and stars, then handed it back to the girl, "here you go, Millie."

    The bouncer fainted and Ni waltzed into the strip club, head held high, joyful to hear about her activism being known to even bouncer's of strip clubs.

    The club was filled with many men and women alike, many scantily clothed. All were searching for one thing....

    Ni ordered an absinthe cadavinthe with a little umbrella on top and took it to go watch the performers when all of the sudden a gross man belched and fell in front of her. He was super greasy, out of shape, and drunk.

    Because she was a nice person, she tried to help the man get on his feet.

    He shoved her off himself, glaring at her with sharp brown eyes.

    "If you don't remove those hands, there's a high likelihood you'll never use them again."

    Ni instantly recognized that lisp. "Liam?"
    "A fan? You must recognize me from my hit single Strip that Down, pretty lady."

    Ni winced away. "What? No. It's me, Ni...from One Direction?"

    "Oh! 1D, that was just a small fragment of my life and career. I don't even think about it anymore because of my massive success. Are you a fan from those olden times? It's such a shame that no one else's solo careers really took off the way mine did." He lisped back.

    Ni chuckled to release the tension, "no...it's me," she empathized, "Niall-Hermione???"

    Liam glanced at her curiously, "huh?" he looked her up and down, "weren't you a dude??"

    Ni rolled her eyes, "no. But, you knew that, right? Gross McGrossPants."

    He frowned. "Hmmmmm," he murmured, "why have you come to disturb my tranquility?"

    "I'm trying to get the band back together. You might smell bad and look yucky but you down?"

    Lispily he replied, "oh lovely lady, 1D is soooooo in the past. I am thriving and making so much money right now with lots of girls by my side who will Strip That Down For Me (yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah). Why would I join your silly little useless band?"

    "But you don't understand! 1D would be a great career move for you. You could finally get the recognition you deserve instead of everyone focusing on Harry what's-his-face."

    "Hmmmmmmmmmmm, go on."

    "I mean, think about it." Liam just stared at her, no thoughts in his brain, Ni continued. " You would be the... frontman? The heartthrob?"