Love that Lasts Forever

the stars

A/N: words: 2323. omg omg omg omg two chapters after this one and its DONE. yallll. anywho. i actually like this chapter yayayayayayayay. anyway, enjoy!

Most people want a necklace to hang around their neck as they sleep. To tuck away, to dangle beside their heart, to hold. What these people do not realize is that, more often than not, blood comes with a glinting piece of metal that shines in moonlight. You yearn for a trophy, you yearn for a sign that your heart beats for someone. With someone. You have your heart dangling from your neck, until your heart is ripped to shreds, and the metal burns through your skin. One more simple, scarring reminder of the fact that what is given can be taken away.

Bucky's name dangles from Sam's neck, and it's been a week.

It's been a week. They transferred Bucky back to Louisiana on day 4, just for simplicity. They told Sam he should go home, that it was unhealthy for him to spend all his time with Bucky. Sam stayed put, waving them off with a quick nod and smile. Bucky hadn't opened his eyes. His hand and shoulder wound had almost healed, but the mobility might be a grey area until Bucky wakes up. The boys visited once. Sam could barely look at them. Sarah looked like she hadn't slept in days, but she still wore her smile, waving Sam off when he commented on it.

He received a text from Stephanie this morning.

Stephanie: Finding out the sex today!

She didn't know. Sam didn't have the heart to tell her. Figured it would only be worse if he told her. She was coming to the house tomorrow, she had been so excited about this part. They wouldn't be there. They couldn't be there. And it stung, and it broke Sam down to the core when he remembered the pure joy on Bucky's face when he learned it was an actual thing.

Mercy couldn't exist. If mercy was real, if mercy could weigh the same as agony, if mercy did exist, Sam would pray for it. Sam would scream out for mercy, scream out just to be spared. After all the lives he's given up just to be here, just to get to two weeks ago, it's all come to a screeching halt. The light at the end of the tunnel doesn't seem to exist, because if it did, Sam would've reached it by now. He would've found that serenity, he would've found the balance of peace and war, and he wouldn't be beside a barely breathing Bucky right now. Peace can dance in the dark, but war will light the world on fire just to spite peace. Love does the exact same thing. Love burns and burns, but it can thrive in darkness, a controlled flame. The music it dances to is self-written, the darkness it finds itself in is welcoming. Uncertain, unknowing, lost, but meant to be discovered, meant to be found.

Sam had found that. What felt like a lifetime ago, he found that darkness, that controlled flame, that was mere moments away from being put out.

~~~~~~~~

Days had passed. Sam was forced to cancel on poor Stephanie, giving her a brief run down on what had happened, which left Sam with more guilt than he thought it would. But, he knew. He knew, when Stephanie called him excitedly, telling him he was having a girl. A girl. He was having a girl, and she was gonna be here soon. And he couldn't tell Bucky. But, he was right in front of him. With a heart that echoed through the room, each one proving he was still here.

The brightest star will shine in the night sky, it's sole purpose to inspire hope. To lead the ones of the road less travelled to the land of riches and prosperity. To lead the ones that needed needle and thread to patch their own to the arms of someone who'd piece them back together with old ballads and gentle touches alone. And when the burning star, that sliver of hope, falls from the sky, where do we turn? The beating hearts of every dreamer and lost soul fade out into the darkness, no gravitational pull, no light at the end of the tunnel. Darkness, where the star used to gleam and glisten.