Promises (Ninjago's Kai x Reader)

Episode 9 - Mistakes

I'm hiding like a coward. I haven't even had the courage to call my father yet. I know he'll just be disappointed in me. I know what he'll tell me I have to do, and I know that I won't be able to do it. The Demons were right; I am weak. I am selfish, and this has gone too far. How did I get here?

"I wish I could go back," I whisper. "I wish I could wish it all away." A tear slides down my cheek. "I wish this could all just stop." Another follows. "I wish the voices would disappear. I wish I wasn't so selfish. I wish . . . I wish . . ."

I roll away from the pillow and throw it to the ground, standing up abruptly. "YOU HEAR THAT, NADAKHAN? I WISH THIS COULD ALL JUST FUCKING STOP!"

My door bursts open and a person clad in blue comes tumbling in. "DON'T USE THAT WORD!"

"Jay?"

He stares at me, panting like he'd just ran a hundred miles with a boulder on his shoulders. When I glance down at the Vengestone ball chained to his leg, I understand why.

"Tasha." He breathes a sigh of relief. "Thank goodness you're still here. Nadakhan has taken both Kai and Zane."

"I know," I say, bowing my head solemnly. "He's also got my mom and Wu."

"Ugh! Of course he does. Do you have any idea how to stop him?"

I nod. "I wished for the power to destroy him once and for all--" Jay's face lights up-- "but if I did that, we'd never get to see our friends again, so we gotta figure out how to save them first."

His face is eerily serious. I don't think I've ever seen him this attentive before. "Any ideas yet?"

"No. That's the only problem." I heave a sigh, running a hand through my hair, messing up the perfect middle part. "I have no idea what to do. I've been trying so hard to figure something out, but--" I stop myself before I say too much.

Jay's eyebrows furrow. "But what?"

Cole's words from about a year ago echo in my head. "He's more observant than you think."

I should trust him. I want to trust him; He's my teammate after all. So why don't I just say something?

"But . . . I'm sure that with the two of us, we'll put something together eventually."

A frown pulls his lips down. I can see it in his eyes that he want's to question me further. To figure out what has me so hesitant so he can fix it and we can end this. He just want's to help. Why won't I let him help?

"Yeah," he finally says. "Yeah, you're probably right."

My heart sinks in my chest. Why can't he just pry a little more? "Right. But, um, right now, I should try to keep my cover. Th-That means you cant be in here for long."

"Right. Um. When should we meet again?"

"Tonight. Around dinnertime, come to my room."

Jay eyes me warily. "Won't the pirates get suspicious if we don't show up for the meal?"

I shake my head. "No. I never join them for meals, and the bottom of the ranks always gets last pick, so you wouldn't eat till later anyway."

"Okay, sounds good." He takes a tentative step towards the door. He still wants to ask. Instead he says, "See you tonight."

"See you tonight."

And with that, Jay disappears, and I am left alone with the voices once more.

~

I'm pacing back and forth across my room. Jay hasn't shown up for our meeting yet and it's way past the dinner rush. I don't wanna leave my room to search for him; That would raise suspicion. Plus I hate the way the crew stares at me.