9:50
I wasn't being fair last night. I fucked Matt, put him to sleep then went and fucked Layne, I went back to cuddle with Matt and when he left this morning I went and fucked Layne again. I know how wrong this is but I don't really have feelings for Matt. I know that he's the better choice but the more I spend time with Layne the more I think he's not. I'm thinking irrationally.
Todds comming to pick me up for work. I really don't know how today's gonna go. I hope he dosnt talk about the night I drunk texted him.... the 2nd time. Actually I think it's the third. It's takes a lot for me to admit that I have a regret. I truly do regret texting him last night to tell him that because I think I made things awkwardv. I really hope it's not, because I like working with him, and I used to like them and I wanted to become friends but I guess he thought something different. I told him one night when I was drunk, I don't remember how many times I've drunk texted him back early. Anyway, one night I told him that I didn't like him anymore. We didn't really dissect that conversation. After telling him that I tried to treat him like I treat all my friends and sometimes he gets the joke, sometimes he doesn't. I'll try to stay up to speed.
00:24
Technically this is the next day but I haven't slept yet. Im going to start ending my pages before I sleep. Right now I'm high sitting in laynes room, sissy and them are having a conversation about some situation that happened at work. Matt's in my bed, asleep. I'm too tired to type rn. It's a strange feeling. Like I get dispatched from the work and it gets hard to breath or move. Haha this is my diary. I can write anything and no sencers. Tee hee
