Lovelanguage: Baking

Chapter 19 - Stone Cold

This night was so weirdly exciting. Nathans presence in the room was and still is so calming and finding him in the kitchen... It gave me butterflies. If that makes me weird, so be it! It's just so cute seeing him enjoy food, how it gives him comfort. And his body... oh my god, it's even more gorgeous than I had imagined. I mean... I didn't really imagine anything specific beforehand, but if I had, the reality would've been better. I still feel guilty that I looked, but I was just so surprised when I heard the noises and saw him in the kitchen, I simply forgot. But I really need to be better about my promises in the future. And cuddling up to him was the happiest I've ever been. It's like the first healthy day after being sick for a while, when you can just feel the energy and strength that you don't take for granted in these situations... I feel like that, but for my loneliness. I just can't stop myself from smiling, simply because of the absence of that feeling of being alone.

Lost in thought Julie cleaned up the kitchen, while making some waffles in her new waffle-maker, which she got as a gift for her move, aswell as cutting some fresh cuts of bread and collecting possible spreads, to put onto it.

It was 8:16am and looking outside it seemed to be a day with lovely blue skies, but not too hot. But it didn't matter how nice the weather, she didn't feel like leaving her apartment and sitting in lecture halls. She just wanted to snuggle up to Nathan and stay home with him. Skipping classes within her first week, didn't sound like her at all. In school she had always been a big perfectionist, full of curiosity, so she almost felt ashamed of thinking about staying home. And on top of that she didn't want Nathan to think of her as too clingy, or irresponsible, or keeping him away from his education and interesting History-Knowledge.

She heard some noises from the living room, that sounded like Nathan was waking up. Excitedly she ran over there.

His eyes blinked open and he smiled widely when he saw her excitedly standing in the room, looking at him.

"You're so cute! Good Morning!" He sniffed into the air a few times.

"Oh wow it smells incredible!"

"Thank you! I'm making waffles!"

"Mmmmh! That's perfect!" he fell back into the pillow, happily smiling. "I don't think I've ever been this happy, right after waking up!"

"I'm so happy to hear that! Especially after you dreamt so badly last night at first, I was so worried!"

Nathan looked at her with big eyes:

"Wait... I'm remembering something! Did that really happen, was I... last night... uhm, is your fridge a little emptier than yesterday?"

Julie laughed a little

"Yes that really happened. And don't worry about it, it's all cleaned up and there was still a bit of regular milk left for the waffle recipe." And after a little pause she added "...and I really enjoyed cuddling a bit... I'm usually not one for physical contact, but it was really... nice." She felt her face heating up from blushing.

Nathan just looked at her with an expression that was impossible for her to read. She tried harder to see if she might needed to apologize. It looked like a mix of embarrassment, surprise or amazement and something else maybe? She didn't know what to do with that, so it was convenient, that she needed to hurry into the kitchen to take the waffles out anyways.

The two of them shared a nice breakfast and drove towards the University. Nathan wore his clothes from the previous day again, which suited him very well, but she was a little worried that the other students were going to notice that and them arriving together again like Theo had asked her about on their second day.

I don't care what people think! She told herself over and over again, reminding herself, that she wasn't living in a little town anymore. And it wasn't about it being Nathan at all, she would've felt the same about every other guy, with whom it would've been obvious she had multiple sleepovers with. It was just the attention and the idea of people speculating about her love life that made her deeply uncomfortable.

When they were walking the path between train station and lecture hall she also noticed Nathan becoming increasingly more nervous and seemingly uncomfortable. Seeing him like this pushed all of her own worries away. She grabbed his warm, soft hand and stroke lightly over his thumb, to let him know everything's alright. He took a deep breath and gave her the most appreciative look she had ever received.

In front of the lecture hall stood Noah, looking like he was waiting for something. When he saw the two of them arriving together, holding hands his body visibly stiffened and after a few seconds he hurried inside.

I already forgot that whole 'Noah might have a crush on me' situation and conversation. But being a little closer with Nathan now hopefully solves the problem, of letting him know I don't reciprocate his feelings, without being sure about his feelings.

Soon she had forgotten that situation again. And sitting safely next to Nathan, this felt like the first day, when she actually had the capacity to listen to the lectures and they were actually really interesting. The two of them had different last lectures of the day. Nathans was going to end around 3:30pm, whereas she had a huge break in her plan and her last lecture was going to be between 4:30 and 6pm. She had thought about tagging along for Nathan's lecture eventhough she didn't need to be there, but then she would need to spend an hour alone afterwards and wasn't looking forward to it. So she decided to use the break to drive home and getting a little bit of rest, so the two of them hugged each other and said goodbye for now.

At home she just watched a semi-interesting show while eating some soup. But the closer it was to the time, when she'd have to leave again, the more anxious she got. Am I scared of meeting Noah without Nathan being there? I don't think so... Mummification was a pretty niche choice of subject on my part. Am I nervous about being alone in there? Probably, but I need to be okay with that... I mean it went well on the first day, meeting Nathan.

Julie had to force herself to leave the house, but she successfully did so. At this time of day Campus was spookily empty. It wasn't completely empty however, there were a few people walking around, especially around the library building. But it felt very empty, especially compared to the busy morning.

When she entered the room, she was relieved to see, that she had been right in her assumption that Noah wouldn't have chosen this course on mummification practices in different cultures. There was just that one, buff, tall guy from Noah's and Theo's friendgroup sitting there, but Julie simply chose to sit in the opposite corner of the room, next to some edgy, but quiet looking girl in a purple hoodie. When the 14th student arrived they were complete, which explained the small room. It was a cool lecture, more interactive than the usual ones with over a hundred people in one room and hoodie-girl was a pleasant companion, eventhough or because they barely talked.

When Julie walked out of the building again it was a little darker, the sun just started to set and the clouds started to be coloured orange and pink by the light. She put her headphones in and started to walk towards the train station. She had walked a few minutes, but when she was at a part of the path, where there were only some of the old, nowadays unused building she heard a deep voice behind her yelling.

"HEY!"

She convinced herself they couldn't have meant her, made her music a little louder and started to walk a little faster.

"JULIE!"

She abruptly stopped, confused that this unfamiliar voice knew her name. She turned around and saw the tall guy from her mummies class. He was closer behind her than she had thought, grabbed her wrist and dragged her in between two of those buildings. He towered over her, punching the wall behind her when he said:

"My Buddy cried today because of you! Don't know why, ya don't even look good... just saying. He thinks you're actually dating that fatty. Thinks he missed his chance. But I know sluts like you!"

He looked her up and down, disparagingly.

"Anyone can get it from you huh?"

He grabbed her shirt in the front, made a fist and pushed her back against the cold stone of the building. "HUH?" he asked more aggressively. She felt a sharp pain in the back of her head and felt like she couldn't breathe because he was still pressing his fist against her solar plexus.

Desperately she started shaking her head.