𝐎𝐋𝐈𝐕𝐈𝐀, shawn mendes

chapter twenty-eight

halley finn
new york city, new york
———

        "one sec...okay, hey," i said through the phone to hailey as i shut the hotel room door. those last 45 minutes had been just...something.

"hall! did you listen to the fucking album?" she cut straight to the chase. yes hailey, i sure did.

"mhmm," was all i could muster to say, but hailey kept rambling. "the whole fucking thing was about you!! go confront him and kiss him and tell him you like him back!"

seriously? i wasn't stupid. i knew that a couple of songs had the possibility of being about me. but i needed to make sure of that before i decided to do anything about shawn and i's situation.

after hearing those songs...and how talented he is at telling stories through lyrics, i think i may need to re-evaluate my feelings. maybe i feel the exact same way that he does.

i'm genuinely happy every time i'm around him and he makes me smile and laugh more than anyone in the world. is that love? or at least a shred of feelings?

but like i told him that first night out in toronto—i don't know what love is or how to love. i'm not in love with shawn. but being around him brings out this feeling; and maybe it's the first step.

"i'm not gonna do that, hailey..." i began, snapping out of my thoughts, "i think i'm gonna be straightforward and ask if they're about me. and then we'll see from there what i'll do."

i just fucking hope they're about me.

"okay, are you seeing him today?" she asked, and i forgot that she didn't know i was in new york.

"uh, i'm with him right now. i made him play me the album because i wanted to listen to it together," i spoke, leaning against the hotel room door.

"halley! why didn't you tell me that first? what did he do during the songs? did he look nervous?" hailey said, and i glanced back into my memory of the last hour.

"he only looked at me during like three of the songs. it was so uncomfortable. i think we both felt just too vulnerable, it was ridiculous," i said, trying to sum up the body language and vibe shawn gave off during the album. "it was just a very weird thing."

we wrapped up the phone call within the next few minutes and hung up. i took a deep breath and twisted the door knob open. i was ready.

i put my phone in my front hoodie pocket and shut the door, walking towards the beds. shawn threw his phone on his bed as he glanced up and followed me with his eyes until i sat on the bed. everything between us was weird; it was like we didn't know how to interact with each other.

"i...i, um, i really liked the album," i mumbled and ran my hand through my hair.

"you did? thanks," he smiled for a second before looking around again. the silence was so fucking loud; it was killing me.

"i wanna do something...but you're gonna have to answer this question truthfully for me to know if i can..." i gulped and sat up on my hands.

shawn's expression changed to one that told me to proceed with the question. i took a deep breath and said the words. "were some of those songs about me?"

i studied his face as his eyes widened in a look that screamed 'i've been caught!'. he stared blankly at me for a second before taking his own deep breath. "seven of them are."

seven. that's half of his album. half of shawn mendes' new album is about me.

i could tell shawn was studying my facial expressions because he looked down as i thought about all the songs he wrote. my face grew confused and i didn't respond, making him dig his face down into his neck.

"oh," i didn't know how to respond. this isn't a very common situation for most people. "well, thank you." what kind of response is that?

if any other girl was in my situation, they'd walk over to shawn and plant the biggest kiss on his lips. i thought about doing that. but i chose to reply how i saw fit.

"you really think in ten years i won't have anybody?" my voice dripped in sarcasm, joking about the song 'when you're ready'.

shawn didn't reply with words. his face quickly turned into a grin and he laughed adorably, looking at me with those fucking adoring eyes i love so much. "believe it or not...taylor wrote that lyric of the chorus," he said after his chuckle.

i didn't buy a fucking bit. "oh, really," i said sarcastically, "what lyric did you write?"

"every other word about how beautiful and perfect you are."

i suddenly felt like i literally couldn't breathe. what was he saying? he blinked hard and looked at me, awaiting a reaction.

i slowly stood up from my bed and took two steps forward to stand in front of him. he didn't even have much time to sit up before i leaned down and placed my lips on his.

i had finally caved. i, halley finn, had realized i was in love with him. and i so desperately hope that he feels the same.

"i hope that's what you wanted from all those love songs," i chuckled as i pulled away, leaving him stunned in front of me. he didn't answer, so i sat down beside him and waited for one.

"it was, but i'm gonna have to try again to see if it was worth it," he chuckled before quickly leaning back in.

— notes!
decided to update this
for funsies ☺️☺️