I changed for you

1

Chay was no fool. He knew Kim was a liar, he knew Kim had betrayed him.
It was astonishing to Chay that people around him had reduced his whole persona to a unidimensional naive and gullible boy. He won't deny, he had those qualities to some extent but he wasn't completely stupid.
He had learnt to put up boundaries when necessary and now was the right time.

He blocked Kim's number and vowed to ignore him for the rest of his life.
It had only been a few weeks of heartbreak when another news turned his world upside down.
His mother was alive.

This new information was a lot to take in. Chay believed he had lost his parents eighteen years ago, when he was just a baby. His brother, Porsche,was the only one who truly cared for him ever since. He grew up with his brother and owed every comfort he ever had to him.
To suddenly have a mother was not what Chay had expected.

It took Chay two days to finally accept and meet his mother, who was living in the mafia family's house. Kim's father's house. He was familiar with the place yet he did not feel good entering it. His brother lead him to a room he was unaware existed.
"Come, Chay. She's a little nervous now but I'm sure she'd love to meet you." Porsche urged him to enter the room.
Slowly Chay went in the sunlit room. A lady was sitting on a chair, painting something on a big white canvas propped up on an easel.
"Good afternoon, ma'am." He said, hesitantly. The woman turned around and looked at him with a puzzled expression on her face.
He knew she couldn't recognise him. Before he could register the disappointment, Porsche interrupted his thoughts.
"Chay! You shouldn't call her "ma'am." She's your mother! Come closer. Let me introduce you."
The woman stood up from her chair and gently grabbed Porsche's arm. She was trying to hide behind him.
"Ma, this is your son, Chay. He's my younger brother. Before I found out about you he was the only family I had." Porsche tried to bring the woman forward.
Chay was now pouting, saddened by his mothers hesitation to meet him. He tried to become comfortable, although he couldn't see how.
"It's really nice to meet you, Ma. After so long."
To call the lady his mother felt very wrong. He had no affection for the stranger that stood before him. Her face looked familiar but everything else was not.

When the room grew silent, he wanted to leave. This meeting was making him cry. All his life he had yearned for a parental figure who would love him, guide him, tell him everything will be okay. Yet he was filled with disappointment on finding one.
"I think Ma is tired. It's better if we leave her alone." Porsche turned to Chay.
He nodded and the brothers left the room. They were greeted by Tankhun in the corridor.
"My sweet little boy!!" Tankhun explained, pulling Chay into a big hug.
"I missed you so much! Don't leave me alone ever. Why did you run away, huh? I was so sad. It became so lonely. You know how boring Arm and Pol have become. Pete is gone too. And your brother always stays with Kinn."
"Phi. I can't breathe." Chay struggled out of Tankhun's arms.
"Lets have lunch together. We have so much to talk about." Tankhun grabbed Chay and dragged him towards the dining hall.
"Are you coming or not?" He paused to address Porsche.
"You two go ahead. I'll be there with Kinn." Porsche smiled
"Alright. Good." Khun continued walking with Chay.

The food was already laid on a table for them in the hall. They sat down as Tankhun instructed Arm to take off his furry hot pink jacket.
"It will get stained if I keep it on. I want to eat in peace for once." Khun said dramatically holding his head as if he had a headache.
Chay smiled. He had missed Khun's antics.
"Okay good. Now tell me everything. How have you been? How's the university? Do you want to live here?"
"Umm. I don't know, Phi. I'm fine I guess. The university is okay too. There's not much work since I just started. I'd love to live with you but I don't want to leave my house."
"Okay. I understand. It would be amazing though if we stayed together. Besides Porsche also works here now, he is practically living here."
"Yeah, that's true."
"If you ever miss me, or your brother come directly. I have your room ready all the time."
"That's very considerate of you, Phi. Thank you."
"You don't have to be so formal with me. Lets eat already. I'm starving!"
Khun served some food to Chay and started eating his food too. He talked about the events that went on in the house and told Chay all the gossip.
"I was so shocked! Can you imagine Pete leaving his job? Like come on! He was so dedicated, the best bodyguard in the whole world! And suddenly he leaves his job! Just like that. Gone."
"Really?"
"Yes! You think I'm joking?"
They had just finished their lunch and were now having tea together.
Arm and Pol had brought cards into the hall. Tankhun was explaining the rules of his self invented card game when Chay froze in his seat.
A man had entered the dining hall. A man he did not want to see. A man he believed would not show up in this house.

"KIM??" Tankhun stood up in utter shock.
"What are you doing here? What is happening today? Everyone's here somehow."
Arm and Pol followed Khun as he went towards Kim.
"Finally someone remembers they have a brother."
"Hello, Phi." Kim said coldly. He spared a small glance towards Chay but his eyes didn't linger on him like they used to.
Chay was trying his best to find some exit. He just wanted to escape. What was going on today? First the awkward meeting with his mother and now this. He was fed up.
"Come! Chay is here too. He came to meet his mother. His mother was dead though, you may ask, but honestly, whatever goes on in this house is beyond me."
Kim's expression changed. He clenched his jaw and his eyes became cold. There was no emotion on his face. It was so hard to guess what he was thinking. Chay could not bear to look at him any longer. He diverted his gaze quickly. He got up from his seat as Khun dragged Kim towards their table.
"What? Where are you going? We haven't even started the game yet."
"Phi, I have university work to do. I'll be late if I don't go. I promise to play with you some other day."
"Hmph. You've changed Porchay. But since you came and had lunch I'll forgive you this time." Khun pouted. He hugged Chay even though he was sulking.
"Text me when you reach home safely, okay?"
Chay nodded and left.
Kim's gaze was on him this time. He was trying his best to ignore it. But before leaving the hall he turned back to look at Kim.
Their eyes met for a brief moment and Chay felt tears welling up in his eyes.
"How could he not show any remorse?" He thought about Kim's nonchalant expression.
He got into the car Porsche had arranged for him. For the whole drive back home he could not stop thinking about Kim. Every memory played in his mind as he looked outside the window.
"Stop thinking about that rat." He said to himself again and again. But could he really do that? Could he forget all the good memories? Could he forget the love he had for Kim? Could he forget how his inspiration had always been Kim?

He tried his best not to cry.
When he reached home he locked himself up in his room and let the tears finally flow.
"I hate him."