She Is Blind

Chapter Twelve: Close Call

   
    The next day, I had rushed off to school, now sure that Gift would be there again since she was around for a break, and I could not wait to see her again. When I walked into my class these days, no one hailed me for coming early because they were now too used to seeing me do that, although very unpredictably too, because I was not constant with it, and I appreciated it because I despised drawing so much attention to myself.

    But when I got to the class, there was no Gift, only Blessing, and my disappointment showed on my face. It also came along with the fact that I did not want to talk to Blessing, because I was not sure of how she really felt about everything, and so I wanted to be away from her as far as possible, just in case she was unhappy, broken and hurt and patiently waiting for me to come close like a waiting snake so she could spew her venom. Of course I felt guilty, and several times I felt unsure and wondered if my heart really knew what it wanted, switching from one girl to another, from On Point to her sister, but my younger brother’s explanatory words had hit home, and I really felt like he was right.

    Several teachers came, each trying hard to finish the syllabus in time for the fast approaching exams. They stood there in front of the whiteboard, talking about how many times they had marked SSCE examinations and the mistakes you could make that could cost you several marks, but at times I shut my mind’s ears to what they were saying and heard nothing intelligible, concentrating more on Gift and rather preferring to enjoy watching them gesticulating wildly like someone trying hard to make a point that was not yet understood or a baby bird trying to fly for the first time.

    It was in one of such moments that Obi, my seatmate and friend tapped me, and whispered a “your girlfriend is calling you” in my ear. I quickly looked out the window, hoping to see Gift, but all I saw was the faraway school playground, and grey clouds gathering slowly in preparation to water the earth. I smiled at how when I was younger, I used to think rain was simply God Almighty urinating on the earth.

    Obi tapped me again, and pointed to Blessing, and then I recalled that Blessing and I might no longer have been together, but these classmates of ours did not know that and still thought we were dating. I used my eyes to follow the direction of Obi’s outstretched finger, and saw Blessing signal me to wait for her during break time. My head felt small, as though compressed by some supernatural force. Was she going to slap me, or scream, or tell me she hated me for forgetting her so quickly, I did not know, and with each passing second, my uncertainty had me panicking and my heart thumping louder than usual, so loud that I wondered if Obi, and my teacher, and everyone in the class could hear it.

    It got to break time, and I felt like making a dash for it, to run back home and lie in bed and say I was sick again. But I convinced myself that I was a warrior, and running from battle would be cowardice, so I went up to her. She was standing just beside her seat and stretching her skirt, and she used her eyes to show me that we were to go outside. Soon we had gone to a secluded area close to our class, and she hugged me very tightly when she was sure no one could see or hear us.

    “Are you not the best person in the world? Even though my sister is blind, and has hurt you in the past, you still chose not to hurt her. I was there in the room when you called yesterday, and listening to you sing that song made me realize I was only being a clog in the wheel of my sister’s being happy. Gift loves and needs you more than I ever will and I guess it is for the best that we separated because I won’t have to sin against God anymore.” she said.

In her voice I could detect a mix of emotions, happiness, sadness, and hurt. This was one girl who sure knew how to take a heartbreak.

    “Even though I had always loved you, and I still do till this point, I still understand that you loved Gift first, and you had always loved her from the beginning. I rather feel guilty for trying to take what belonged to my sister in her absence and I wish I had never said anything about loving you. Love is all vanity, but is a sweet thing to feel, and I will always cherish the moments we had together. It was hard to leave you and stop loving you altogether but if I have to do the right thing, I have to let you go to the one who owns your heart. Please don’t break her because if you love her, you love me too.” she continued.