She Is Blind

Chapter Fourteen: Love and Hate

My anger arose from my hatred of James and the willingness of my best friend to forgive him so easily. He had beaten me up, nearly had the both of them raped, had gotten their parents under tension, and escaped out of the country scot free, only to come back with a sad tale and she had forgiven him so easily in the name of being a Christian.

I hated him with all my being, and I imagined them falling in love just like I had seen it happen in several romance movies. The thought of it alone annoyed me the more because I had only saved them that day in the bush from James, and yet the things that happened that day were still fresh in my head, and thinking about them still hurt. I kept on trying to imagine how Gift would feel after hearing about her sister’s folly, although she would not be hearing it from me because I was unwilling to tell anyone. It was a secret and I meant to keep it as such.

I got home and met only AB and Jemima around watching television, thankfully PHCN had not cut off the power supply. My brother however, had unfortunately chosen the wrong moment to play a prank on me and a fight nearly started with us raising our voices at each other, causing our sister to cry. I was about to throw a punch when I remembered that he had nothing to do with my being angry, and so I apologized to him and went to my room, slamming the door with a force that seemed to shake the very foundations of the house.

My sister knew I was angry, and so she would usually avoid me as one would avoid a leper, but my brother knew how to handle me better and soon he was knocking on my door, something he only ever did when I was angry. He was always bursting into my room as though it was his.

I asked him to come in, and he entered very quietly. I was lying on my bed with my face covered down on my pillow and so I did not see what he was doing. When I raised my head from the pillow I saw him playing a single player game, something I knew he did just to attract my attention. I looked at him with a smile and thought of how having a brother who understood you was gold. I felt very sorry for nearly venting my anger on him, and I apologized again.

“Yeah. I accept. You knew I would beat you in a good fight so you have to apologize.” he joked, his eyes not leaving the game.

“Should we finish the fight?” I asked him, raising an eyebrow.

“2000 naira for the winner of this game if we play together.” he changed the topic.

I already had 1000 naira, so I gladly accepted, but a few minutes into the game, he was beating me hard and I felt like giving up. Soon he won and I was forced to give him my 1000 naira, promising to pay up the rest.

“So what annoyed you so much this afternoon?” he queried, running his nose along the money he won with his eyes half closed as though there was cocaine on it, a habit he learned from a movie where the main character was a drug peddler who always put cocaine on dollar notes and sniffed them.

“We will talk about it later. I want to apologize to Jemima for frightening her.”

She was in the living room watching cartoons when I found her, and I went to her and gave my apologies, promising not to frighten her again. She accepted, and I gave her a fifty naira note I had found just there in my pocket as a token of peace. AB joined us and changed the television channel to watch a movie while I plugged my phone to charge.

It had been an interesting movie, one about two best friends in love, reminding me of Gift and making me replace the movie’s main characters with us in my head. Soon I had forgotten why I was angry, not until the power supply was cut off when the movie had reached an interesting climax.

“I just hate this country. I will soon pack all my belongings and trek to America. At least they always have light.” she complained angrily with her childish voice.