𝐅𝐈𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐎𝐍: 𝐦𝐢𝐲𝐚 𝐨𝐬𝐚𝐦𝐮

(xxxi) punishment

"hi...", his voice murmured, leaving a lazy kiss just underneath your jaw. just enough to stir up something truly warm in your heart.

you woke up that morning slightly groggy but perfectly content with arms wrapped around you. his face was buried in your neck and if not for the air conditioner, you would've felt a bit hot.

"time to get up", you whispered into his hair but he only pulled you closer.

"five minutes, sakusa-san", he whispered back, his voice not as sleepy as yours- rather more languid and amused. a small laugh escaped your lips and he groaned in protest as you slowly pulled away.

"breakfast, miya-san?", your smile was wide and genuine as you sat cross legged in bed, still half naked and moderately sore from last night's activities.

he raised an eyebrow and then tucked an arm behind his head, moving up slightly but not quite upright. "depends on what the breakfast is, sakusa-san"

the blatant smirk on his face clearly reflected his thoughts but you threw a pillow at him, "shut up"

"i didn't say anything!", he laughed, in a way that indicated he was trying to suppress more laughter.

he was so pretty. his dark hair were messy and the silver grey of his eyes stood out as he looked at you.

you crawled up to him instead of getting off the bed like you'd originally planned. he sat upright, a satisfied expression on his face as he allowed you to settle down on his thighs.

his hand reached in between your thighs and then-

"and then we had morning sex", you said flatly, impressed by how kiyoko had maintained a straight face throughout the description of your dream last night.

if there was any expression, it was just the usual hint of pity that anyone who knew you'd been through some shit had on their faces.

"have you had this dream before?", she asked, notepad at the ready, "and is this a real thing that happened or just a scenario?"

the question made you look somewhat downcast. kiyoko still didn't know the full details because you had failed to open up completely.

"i can't say i haven't dreamt about him since it ended", you decided to be honest nonetheless, "and yeah, it's real.

it was even more terrible that the first time you had this dream, you were in bed with rintarou. you'd woken up to him still asleep, and he hadn't mentioned anything to you so you were positive you hadn't mumbled something in your sleep. but you weren't completely sure.

"y/n", kiyoko sighed, putting her pen down so that it produced a tap sound, "i really need to know the details of what happened. i can't determine how exactly to help you otherwise."

you shook your head no. "i don't think the dream's related to what went down"

"what do you think then?", she asked, surprised that she didn't have to spoon feed you as usual.

"he has a new girlfriend. i think i just miss him."

it wasn't false, was it? you simply shouldn't have gotten into that elevator with him. it took you right back to the elevator in montreux. right to the beginning.

if you could do it over, you would've undone your downfall without any hesitation.

because at least in that alternate universe, you wouldn't be so pathetically in love that you tried to justify the actions that ruined you. you wouldn't have stayed up so many nights crying because you felt like the loneliest person there ever was.