Group Z

Chapter 10

Life takes on a strange kind of routine, I spend as much time with Sapphire as I possibly can. I help out around the house, doing everything from cooking to cleaning, anything to come across as reliable, trustworthy.

I find that I really enjoy cooking alongside the family. It is truly a family affair with everybody chipping in, laughing as they prepare food.

I discover a talent in cooking that I never knew I had, something that privately makes me smile as I know the primary reason is because I'm so used to following orders that I can follow a recipe with little to no problems.

Another surprising development is that Benny has become infatuated with me. He clings to me everywhere I go, demanding for me to play with him and read him stories at night. I find myself falling further and further in love with this family who accept each other so freely.

However, there are times where it strikes me out of the blue that I miss the rest of Group Z and the longer I'm with the family and Sapphire the more I realise that there is a better way of life and I become tangled in the same thread that prevents Sapphire from running into the sunset. I can't leave them behind. The ideas fight within me creating a constant conflict.

To keep Group Z safe, I need to kill the family. To keep the family safe, I have to betray my other family, the one I grew up with. Thoughts whir around and around in my head refusing to settle. I try to ignore them as best as I can but I know I can only do it for so long.

Every night after the house is silent, me and Sapphire sneak out and play in the forest. We chase each other through the trees and although it is only playful it still has its benefits like maintaining fitness, helping to counteract the extra meals I probably shouldn't be eating and, Sapphire's stamina is also growing, each day she can run a little further. A little faster.

Every night we end up on what I've come to think of as 'our hill.' But we never go beyond it, we are both connected to the Sector, her with her family, her responsibility to them, me with mine, my responsibility to the mission, to orders. This is the unspoken agreement we have come to, we never go past the hill.

About a month after I first came to the family, we are on our hill with my head in Sapphires' lap this time, dozing contentedly, unused to feeling so safe in someone's presence when she suddenly drops a bombshell.

'So Zi, who are you really?'

I immediately bolt upright. I haven't brought my daggers with me on these outings for several weeks and for the first time I wonder if that was a mistake. I instantly stop that thought in its tracks. This is Sapphire. For the first time my mind is perfectly clear. I won't kill her, I can't.

'What do you mean?' I respond, forcing my voice to remain calm.

'You know what I mean.' She says in an equally calm, sure voice. 'I've seen your back, when you're sleeping. I've found the daggers you keep under your bed and the first time you came here you just knew the way back without being told, and the way you move! It's so graceful and sure, plus you didn't have a limp when you hurt your leg.'

I just sit there shocked that she recognised all these things about me. I feel some admiration for how observant she is. And an unknown feeling that I can't quite identify that she cared enough to want to pry, even that she watched me sleep.

I slump my shoulders realising my gig is up.

'Fine.' I say, surprising myself at how easily I spill all my secrets.

Deep down I guess it's because I don't want to hide from Sapphire. I want her to know the real me. In that second, I make my decision. I will protect both families. Somehow. Someway.