❝ would this have been easier if i knew it all before? ❞
In which emotions change and Marcie finds out just how complicated her life can get.
[ heartstopper || season 1 -
extended summary inside
a LOVER'S CHOICE book ]
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Mars wasn't what you would call a people pleaser. She understood that she had her own autonomy and if she didn't want to do something, she would gladly let you know. But it's not always that easy, like having a dozen eyes on you as this guy pressures you into not leaving and to dance with him, that tends to make it harder to say no.
She's a teenager and falls to peer pressure just as easily as anyone else, through no fault of her own. Sometimes its just easier to do as they say then cause conflict in trying to reject them.
It got boring quickly, not that she was enjoying herself at all. She thought it would be better if she tried to, because if she didn't Harry would probably push harder to try and make her enjoy dancing with him. Mars was smart, not genius—level smart, but smart enough to know she wasn't going to be able to leave. She had hoped that the small shred of decency she has to believe Harry has hidden deep down would make its debut; there was no such luck.
When she had seen the time on her phone as she went to leave, it was only a little after ten. She still had about twenty minutes until her mum came to pick her up and, even if she managed to get out of her predicament and tell her to come sooner, it would only get her the answer that she's already on her way or make her wait for her mum to get here, which Harry would probably use to pester her further. So she does what she had to in order to save herself.
Maybe if she was around friends, her anxiety wouldn't be so bad about dancing, but she can help but feel judging eyes all around her as she's forced to dance with the star of the party. Her face already states her displeasure, not that anyone around her would care enough about her to ask if she's okay or try to help her escape the situation.
Mars thinks back to her motto; she doesn't hate this because it's new, she hates it because her boundaries were overstepped, the simplest of all boundaries. Respecting no as an answer.
She can't help the thought that enters her head, blaming Harry's mum for failing to teach her son about one of the simplest things. Perhaps she's one of those 'boys will be boys' mothers.
As she dances, moving her body from side to side with little enthusiasm, Mars plays with her thumbs, feeling her heart beat against her ribcage from a mixture of the dancing and emotions running through her. Her eyes dart around, looking through the gaps in the crowds and over people's shoulders to try and get a good view of the exit. Every attempt of an excuse she comes up with is shot down by the possible failures she comes up with in her mind. It leaves her with her last option, one she didn't want to resort to but is left with no other choice
