Ace of Spades

Peace Amid Chaos

"Naniniwala kayo sa resulta ng eleksyon? The count itself was absurd! At ang bilis ng counting. The fastest it's ever been in years."

"31 million is possible at alam niyo 'yan. And we have the technology now para mapabilis ang count, para namang hindi natin chineck 'yun."

"31 million is possible? Oo, alam natin mataas ang voter turnout. Ngayon lang ako nakakita ng gano'n karaming tao sa voting precincts and our internal data supports this claim. But that doesn't mean the 31 million number ay warm bodies talaga."

"The PPCRV and other independent election watchdogs are already cross-counting. So far, nagmamatch ang election count ng COMELEC at ng kanila. The 31 million is highly possible. How would we contest election results with that?"

"Magkaiba ba tayo ng pinapanood na balita? Multiple election violations such as vote buying and the numerous cases of broken machines on election day are enough for us to contest the election results."

"Everyone is already on their side! Panalo na sila una pa lang at alam nating lahat 'yun. We hoped, and we lost, now we do the best we can do to take action but I'm telling you now, dahil sa disimpormasyon na trinabaho nila for more than a decade, the 31 million vote count is very very possible."

It's so loud.

So boisterous.

So many opinions, so many thoughts.

Kailan ba kayo magkakasundo?

She was livid.

Her head was aching, her throat felt dry, and anger bubbled in her chest. She looked around the room, her vision spinning, watching everyone's mouth open and close as they talked, but everything that they were saying became mere noises to her. She could see their hands flail around, pointing at the data shown on the screens and on the papers, but to her, they weren't making any sense.

"So gano'n na lang 'yun? Hindi na natin icocontest? Hindi tayo magpapamanual count at isusuko na lang natin 'tong eleksyon na 'to?"

"Syempre ilalaban natin. But we have to prepare for the worst. The Supreme Court is filled with their allies, they've met with the SMART machine distributors early on this year, at ang senado ay hawak na nila. Most of those who won in Congress are their allies too. We will contest but we have to be ready to accept."

She tapped her pen on the desk and shifted on her seat. Accept? She thought. Bakit natin iaaccept? She could feel all eyes on her as she sighed. She locked eyes with Leni and she felt the burden in her heart increase tenfold.

And so did her anger.

"Iiwan niyo ako?" She asked, voice only a little above a whisper. Everyone seemed to stop what they were doing as they were reminded that the only person who won in their team was Risa. And she will have no one on her side there.

"Iiwan niyo ako? Gano'n na lang 'yun?" She asked again, her voice now raising. Chel clasped her wrist, attempting to calm her down. But she was livid. She scanned the room, staring intensely at everyone there.

"Leni," she called out. "Iiwan niyo ako do'n? Mag-isa?"

Risa laughed bitterly, slamming her pen on the desk and shook her head. "Iiwan niyo ako sa ere? Hindi man lang natin icocontest?"

"Sen. Risa, we will conduct a thorough investigation on our own," one of the campaign managers assured.

"Have you even released anything na nagcocondemn sa election results? Did we rally in 1986 for this?"

"No, but is there really anything we can do? Mainit tayo sa mga mata ng lahat ngayon, lalo na kayo nila VP Leni."

"Hindi natin napagdesisyunang lumaban sa una para lang sumuko sa oras na kinakailangan talaga nating lumaban! Ano, hanggang do'n na lang tayo?"

"Risa..."

"Mag-isa lang ako do'n!"

Risa was standing up now and everybody else had looks of sympathy on their faces. The opposition had already been a mess from the very beginning but now, with Risa being one of the few people who made it, it became messier.

"Labas muna kayo," she heard Leni instruct. "Mag-uusap lang kami ni Sen. Risa."

Everybody but Risa nodded in understanding. When they were the only two people left in the room, Leni approached Risa and urged her to sit down. But she wouldn't.

"Leni," she said, voice balanced between anger and a plea. "Please, ilaban natin. Ilaban niyo."

"Hindi ka naman namin iiwan do'n. We'll still rally behind you."

"That's not good enough."

"You'll have my support. You'll have me pa rin."

"And I'm telling you that it's not enough that you're supporting me! I need to know you're willing to fight with me, Leni."

"I am!"

"No, you aren't. I told you I was going to be here with you, not only to support but also to fight, now and always. Pero ikaw? Hindi sapat na suportahan mo ako. I need you to take a stand!"

"Ris," Leni held her hand and caressed it. "I will fight with you. Until and as much as I can. Pero kung hindi talaga natin 'to mahanapan ng butas then I can't do anything else. You know that."

"It's like watching a funeral," Risa said sadly, sitting down and massaging her temple with the hand that wasn't clasped with Leni's. "Nakakapanlumo, nakakapanghinayang, nakakagalit."

Leni sat down, moving her seat closer to Risa's, and wiped away the tear that escaped the younger woman's eye. "Alam ko and I'm sorry. There's not much I can do."

Risa nodded in understanding, knowing that there really wasn't much that Leni or their team could do. She just wished it wasn't the case. She wished the winning party had some sort of failure or mistake that could be used against them, she wished there was something they could do to fix this, to make them win because she knew they deserved it — the country deserved it. Risa wished for a lot of things so badly together with the 15 million people weeping for this loss.

"I will fight with you," Leni affirmed. "Hayaan mo akong samahan ka sa laban mo katulad ng pagsama mo sa'kin sa laban ko."

The older woman stood up, faced her, and continued, "We're not going to stop here. Tuloy ang laban natin. Kasama mo pa rin ako."

Everything else was so loud.

So boisterous.

There were so many opinions and so many thoughts.

Leni held her face with the other hand that wasn't tightly clasped with hers and softly kissed her forehead. But let me be your peace.

Risa sat there, eyes closed as she savored the comfort and the peace that Leni's gesture gave. You are my peace.

"I wish things were different, Lens."

"Me too, Ris. I wish things were different too."