REM // Van McCann

75. No Taking That Back

Bondy's behavior seemed to change after that. If you weren't paying attention, you wouldn't notice that he was upset with his friend but didn't want to show it. I'm not sure why he's so fussed about it. It's actually flattering that he's trying to poach me to work for him but it's too early. I've only been at DecodeREM a few months and don't want to abandon ship after all the hoops they've gone through to bring me here.

Bondy carefully put his gift down, moving other gifts around so his could lean against the wall. As I watched him, the answer came to me. He's not upset at me knowing but more so at how I found out. The both of us knew it was too soon to think about poaching but it was on the back of Bondy's mind. He was just waiting for the right moment to tell me. But now that the cat's out of the bag....

"I'm not upset or anything. Just surprised," I told him. The last thing I wanted was for Bondy to think about this all night when he should be having fun.

"Yeah, sorry about that. I just didn't want you to find out that way. You've only been at DecodeREM a few months now. I know you're not looking to leave anytime soon so that's why I held off on telling you," Bondy explained. "I can't go into too much detail about the work I do but big things are happening. We're going to have to expand our team in the future and I'd love to have you. Maybe after you've been there a year, you'll seriously consider."

Even though what Bondy told me was essentially nothing, I was still intrigued. What work does he do that he can't tell me? All along, he was saying he was still training but now I know that's a lie.

"Of course," I told him. "It's good to keep your options open. Thanks for thinking about me."

"Wait...so you plan to stay here?"

"What d'ya mean by that?" I asked back. Bondy blushed and scratched the back of his head.

"Nowt...I just thought you wanted to go back to the UK to be with your woman."

I blushed, not expecting the conversation to go this way. I've not told him much about Clara. Hell, he doesn't even know her name but he knows I've got someone on my mind and that's why I turn down advances from other women. I was still holding out and I didn't realize it was that obvious.

"Well, I still have time to decide. I've only been here a few months," I replied, not wanting to go into too much detail. It's none of his business, really, and it was complicated. I often question myself if we still have feelings for each other. When we do talk, it's good and we pick up where we left off, but the long silence is enough to make me wonder. It was quiet between us and apparent that we were on a touchy subject.

"Why don't we eat something?" Bondy suggested and I nodded my head, following him to get some food.

The main dishes were outside on the barbecue but there was quite a bit of food and snacks in the kitchen as well. We decided to sit in the back garden because it was less crowded and so we could hear ourselves without fighting over the music for air space. Partway through eating, one of Bondy's friends offered the both of us a joint. I was a bit hesitant to accept rolled joints from strangers since you never know but decided to accept it because I know my tolerance.

Bondy lit his joint and offered to light mine. When Bondy said there'd be drugs, I thinking other drugs, not weed, but I was glad I was wrong. The last thing I wanted was for one of us or the both of us to be unable to go home. I've only been with Bondy in a work setting and never really got to know him personally so I don't know how wild he is. It didn't take long for the THC to kick in. I could feel myself relax, feeling more at ease. My worries about not feeling welcome at the party were gone.

"What kind of music did the both of you make?" I asked him.

"Psychedelic rock. We'd get stoned and just jam away on our instruments. It's funny because at the time, we thought we made the biggest hit and then we'd listen to it the next day and it's shite." I laughed, tilting my head back because I totally understood what he was getting at. You do the strangest things when stoned.