Technoblade Never Dies: A New Adventure

Chapter 16 - Boiling Eggs

"Alright. I heard a cluck. Where are all the swimming chickens?" Technobalde asked.

After building the multi-storey animal farm, Technoblade decided to procrastinate luring four-legged animals. Sure, beef, mutton and pork were more delicious and fulfilling to eat. However, there was one staple that could not be ignored when eating sandwiches.

He needed the eggs. Only one animal in Minecraft laid edible eggs. Technoblade refused to experiment with cooking an Ender Dragons' egg. He wasn't prepared enough for the end. Hence, his best bet was to smack some grass to get seeds and lure those cluckers into his simple one-block egg harvester.

Cluck! Cluck! Cluck!

There it was to his left!

Thankfully, the chickens he found were not that far from his mountain base camp. He had to travel a little out into the distance, but he could still see the mountain behind him. Thankfully, he wasn't lost in his quest for chickens.

"Come on," he talked to the blocky cluckers and hissed as a feather-brained friend strayed off the path and into the water.

Crossing this river was becoming a challenge. Technoblade wondered if he should have made a better bridge.

"Nah!" he brushed it off as he nudged the chicken onto the one-block plank bridge he made in haste. Speed bridging was the only bridge he built.

After half a morning, they were finally back at base camp. The cluckers tried to flee, but Technoblade was faster.

Using the power of switching seeds to his other hand, he opened the trap door above his egg coop and shoved them into the cage they would be forced to produce unhatched children for his consumption forever.

"Annnd in!" the Potato Lord cackled madly and admired his new prisoners from their pretty glass prison. Yes, he made the front using glass blocks because he felt fanciful.

Although using a barrel at the bottom of that hopper instead of a double chest worked the same for an egg farm, Technoblade still wasted resources on aesthetics. Perhaps the joy of seeing their miserable beady eyes every morning when he woke up from the terrible wooden bed inspired his madness. Either way, the egg farm was finally done. It would not be long before he had the eggs he wanted.

"Now to check on my wheat."

The square patch of hoes but untreated soil looked wrong. Technoblade still found it difficult to get used to not seeing tilled ground with light brown and dried soil surrounding the radius of this single water block source beneath his trapdoor.

The seeds he planted were growing well, but none of them had become fully grown wheat yet. However, right behind this wheat field, the trees had grown, and that gave Technoblade an idea.

"Theoretically, leaf blocks are compostable. I have enough iron to get things started too. This should not be impossible."

Spending two precious iron ingots as an investment for a potentially genius solution to crash the bone meal market, Technoblade started working on his stonks.

The tree he wanted to shear was massive. It had too many leaf blocks covering the ground around its trunk like Cinderella's dress. Although this tree would yield almost half a stack of saplings, Technoblade calculated the returns for shearing every leaf block compared to saplings. It would make him enough bone meal for his hay bale quest. Even if he ran out of saplings, the surrounding forest is made of spruce. He could collect saplings anytime he ran out.

With shiny new shears in his dominant hand, Technoblade made quick work trimming the bottom rows of leaves and chucked them into the hopper above his composting bin so that they could do the work while he collected more of the good stuff above.