Dealing With Hawkins

Chapter 24

Pumasok ako sa school nang medyo maga ang aking mga mata. Last night I cried hanggang sa makatulog ako. At nagising ako ulit nang narito parin ang sama ng loob, guilt and sadness.

I hate Edward for giving me this kind of situation na alam niyang ikakasama ng loob ko. I really hate what happened last night.

I hate myself for betraying my student. The one who cares for me, the one who treated me nicely. The one who made me realize na kaya ko rin palang mag mahal.

Mag mahal ng mabilisan. There's so much pain inside me right now at ang worst pa, wala akong kaibigan na mapag sasabihan. 

I grabbed my bag and books, nag lakad ako papasok sa room. Parang sobrang lungkot na hindi ko makita ang mukha niya sa umagang ito. Her seat is vacant, maging ang mga classmates niya ay nag tatanong din kung nasaan siya. 

"Turn your books to page 81, i'd like you to answer the questions, Both A and B.". Sabi ko sa kanila.

Mag discuss sana ako ngayon, pero wala ako sa mood. I want to think, I want to have a clean mind.

Halos umabot na sa isandaang tawag ang ginawa ko kay Edward, pero wala parin, hindi niya sinasagot. I want to ask him kung kamusta na ang trabaho niya..

I want to tell him na huwag nilang saktan si Sage. Dahil hindi ko mapapatawad ang sarili ko if ever na may mangyaring masama sa kaniya.

I hate myself because I framed her. I really hate myself.  I glance at my students when they are talking and murmuring something.

"I saw a group of people, maybe they abducted her". One of my students said.

I facepalm. The operation should be a secret, but these students saw what happened last night.  

"Carlo, are you done answering your book?". I asked him. Bigla siyang tumingin saakin and he said sorry.

"We are just worried Miss Katerina. We saw her last night. Maybe we should report it to the police?". He suggested. Umiling ako.

"I saw Sage this morning, she's okay. Now, continue to answer your book. And, class, wag kayo mag sabi ng pangyayari na hindi kayo sure, huwag kayong mag kalat ng false information". Banggit ko. Natahimik na sila at nag patuloy sa pag sasagot.

Dahil sa mga sinabi ko, lalo akong na guilty. I never see her kanina, hindi ko siya nakita and I wish totoo ang sinabi ko because I really wanna see her. 

"Half day lang kayo today?". I asked them.

"Yes Miss Katerina.".

Yumuko ako and I tried to call Edward again.

"After class, I want you to work on a group assignment. I will group you into five. I want you to make a blue print. Bahala kayo kung ano ang gusto ninyong design or type of building. You will pass it tomorrow, since Half day lang kayo. That is your final activity before final exam. Any clarification?". I asked.

"Miss, I just want to ask, kung saan mai- gu- group si Alison?". Napakamot ako ng  noo. 

"She's excuse, she's doing something important. For now kayo muna. Okay? Class dismissed. And paki iwanan ang mga book dito sa table ko". Pahayag ko. They all stood up and give their book one by one.

"Good bye Miss Katerina".

"Good bye class". 

Nang makalabas na sila lahat tiyaka ako napayuko at napaluha nalang bigla. Bakit nararamdaman ko ang pakiramdam na ito? Why do I have this feeling.