How You Remind Me

35

I was beginning to feel a little...frustrated.

Meredith had moved in her stuff a month ago and somehow managed to talk me into sleeping in our bed together. It was torture.

Though there'd been a few times where we almost crossed that line, one or the other of us seemed to back off as if something suddenly grabbed hold of us and made this feel wrong. That's not a good feeling to have, not now, not with us.

I picked up my phone as I walked out of a patients room and dialed the one guy I knew would have some advice for me.

"Hello?"

"Mark." I said with relief "How's it going?"

"It's going..." he hesitated and sounded like he was walking outside of wherever he was. "Oh God man, you gotta save me."

"What?"

"Addison has turned into some kind of pregnancy monster." He ranted "I don't know what happened, its like the bigger her stomach gets the more atrocious she gets. Moody and irritated is a freaking understatement! I love the woman to death and I can't wait to meet our baby but...my GOD! No wonder our parents stopped having kids after us."

My response was to laugh...hysterically.

"Dude, this is so not funny."

"No, no it's not." I chuckled "But you have to admit, this is probably pay back right?"

"Yeah." He groaned "So you called me, what did you need?"

"A little advice."

"I hope its not father advice, for starters I'm not there yet."

"No, I don't need father advice. Meredith isn't pregnant...we haven't been doing anything to even get her pregnant yet."

"You haven't had sex yet!" he gasped "What's the hold up?"

"I was hoping you could tell me." I sighed "We've almost done it, she's sleeping with me every night, clothes have been shed...but when it comes down to it we...hesitate."

"Well stop hesitating."

"It's easier said than done Mark." I murmured "I don't want to mess this up, neither does she."

"You're letting your past insecurities get in the way of your future relationship. If anything will ruin it, that will."

I frowned as I tried to make sense of what he'd just said.

"Look, you and Meredith have a messy past. But if you want to move forward with your future you've got to literally just put all the hurt and turmoil to rest man."

"Put it to rest."

"Yes, put it to rest." He sighed, I heard something in the background and he gasped "Shit, we're out of ice cream...gotta go man!"

I laughed as I put my phone back in my pocket.

"Hey."

"Hey you." I grinned as I turned to the beautiful woman beside me and graced her with a kiss. "I just got off the phone with Mark."

"Really?" she smiled "How is he doing?"

"Probably planning an exorcism for Addie." I chuckled "According to him she isn't doing well with pregnancy."

"I can see that." She giggled.

"You were never like that with our pregnancy."

"No." she mumbled, I felt like shit by the small flash of hurt still in her eyes "But then again, I was only pregnant for ten weeks."

A soft, slightly uncomfortable silence fell between us, I let out a soft breath and smiled at her.

"I've been thinking." I finally said "Maybe we should finally put her to rest."

"Her?" she frowned

"The baby." I explained "Sorry, I just always felt like it was a girl."

I waited nervously for a reaction, finally a soft smile spread across her lips.

"I thought so too."

"So what do you say?" I asked "Maybe we could pick out a name, find a little headstone and find a spot on the property just for her..to remember her and, lay her to rest?"

"Are you doing this because you want sex?"

"Yes." I blurted, her eyes widened "I mean no...maybe. I just think that in order to move forward, we need to put everything to rest."

"Literally."

"Yes." I gulped as I watched her eyes take the idea in. "So what do you think?"

"I think the spot under the tree up on the bluff that overlooks the lake and all the land is perfect."

"Really." I smiled "That's what I had in mind too."

"So you're really not just doing this to get into my pants."

"No." I frowned, she smirked and gave me a wink.

"That's too bad...it was starting to work."