Arcane Guardian ↣ Avenged Sevenfold

44 ☼ surprise

OCTOBER 2013

"How do I keep getting roped into this every time." Noelle rolled her eyes. Okay, maybe she liked the plain ass red bridesmaids dress better than what Andrea jigsawed her into. But her joining Jules' bridal party was very last minute and against her will. Further proof of this was that the four girls, including Jules' sister Sierra,had made a last minute Salvation Army run for Noelles' dress the day before during the bachelorette party. She had been attempting (operative word, attempting) to cut back on work and interact with people—even if it was just going out with Mandy, Jules and Sierra once a week.

"Doesn't some part of you like being pretty?" Mandy mascara'd herself in the mirror besides her friend.

"Sick of weddings." She said. "I'm never getting married. Scratch any of those plans. If anyone feels the need to get engaged after Jules, I'm sending them a thousand dollars and some fruit.

"Word." Mandy said emotionlessly. Noelle wanted to smack herself when she realized how hard watching this day must be for Mandy.

She didn't feel like an apology for the insensitivity would be appropriate. Not right then. Mandy looked like she was having a hard enough time pulling it together already.

Thankfully no aisle walking though. Matt and Jules had planned a small beach wedding. The only people walking were Jules, and her dad.

"Hey ladies, we need everybody but the bride." Brian popped his head in. Noelle beat the bitchiness she was having a hard time suppressing down with a mental bat. "Jules, your dad will be in here in a few. You look incredible, hon."

Jules smiled back at the three girls as they filed out. Much to her awkwardness, her and Brian ended up standing beside each other. "How's being a best man going for you?" She attempted to make small talk before remembering why it went so bad last time.

Mandy kept to herself while Sierra scrolled through Facebook. So no help there.

"Matt is so nervous." Brian laughed, almost hopeful she would ask. She could tell some tension was broken. "He's panicking about a million different things. Far more of a bridezilla."

Noelle laughed back. "Like how?"

"Well Shads isn't typically the type of guy to cry because he thought his tie was a shade off her dress, so I think I'm right in saying he's pretty freaked."

They both smiled as the four of them got into Brian's car.

☼

The bridal party stood nearing the edge of the beach as Jules made her way down. "She is so fucking hot." Mandy shook her head. "What'd a weirdo like Matt do to get such a dime?"

Noelle shoved Mandy playfully. Honestly she was having a hard time taking her eyes off of Brian. It felt like if she looked at him, everything would fall apart. But if she looked away it was like she was missing the chance to forever. And he was sneaking enough glances back that she was hyper aware of each movement she made. She wasn't paying attention to most of the service, instead, shamefully going to a place in her head where the same words were being said, but the situation different.

The wedding was over before she knew it and the guests were all instructed to move over towards the pavilion for a beach-catering-drinking after party. Brian and Noelle treaded slightly behind the others as the group congregated at tables. Noelle looked out at everyone serving themselves from the table with all the food, and Matt popping a bottle of champagne with Jules. And all she could think of was how much she wanted to leave. Matt and Jules would want photos. She thought of all the pretending she would have to do for the rest of the night and wished she hadn't agreed finally to be a bridesmaid.

The floor cleared for Matt and Jules to have their dance towards the middle of the reception, and Noelle observed the way Matt looked at her—and truly was happy for them. The way he pulled her in, the dance more of a long, victorious hug.

She walked from the venue to the far end of the beach, taking off her heels halfway through. The night was setting in, skies different shades of muted blues, oranges and grays. She sat by the shore, the edges of the dress being soaked slightly in the saltwater.

"You always want to escape." Brian sat next to her, looking at her as if waiting for a response. When he didn't get one, he created one. "Why?"

She shrugged. "I guess I'm just displaced these days."

"Don't you see you're right at home?"

She stayed silent.

"There's a group of people up there who love you. Who want you back. People who are willing to wait as long as it takes, trying as hard as they can."

She looked out at the sea and put her head on his shoulder. He wrapped an arm around her, keeping them both warm as the chill of the water began to set in for the night.

She unhooked her necklace, taking her hand to open Brian's palm and handing it to him. "You should really have it back."

"Keep it."

"It belongs with you."

He got up, pausing before doubling the chain and clipping it around his wrist. He looked back to the semi distant lights of the party. "Do you want to dance?

"Here?"

"Of course, dumbass." He extended her a hand. "I might have shitty service but I still have a phone."

And so they danced. It was supposed to be a song, but you know how those can turn into five or six when you're looking into someone's eyes and seeing the same soul in three different vessels. She held her head up to his chest and felt his heartbeat.

"I always wanted to see your eyes." Brian said as the last song clicked off. He still held her close to him. "I don't remember much that you and Mandy didn't tell me. But I remember they were gray. My world was gray. And I always just wanted to see their color. They're the most beautiful blue green I've ever seen." He pushed some of her hair behind her ears. "And maybe I'll never remember much. But the way I loved you is real. Seeing you for you as a 26 year old in that studio... I couldn't forget that. I can't forget I loved you so much." He looked away, taking a deep breath in and out. "Can you tell Matt I said bye?"

She nodded, as he parted from her and walked away. She had a feeling she should stop him. Maybe kiss him. Maybe just keep him there with her on the beach forever and rot there. Either way, she had an unnamed feeling like she wouldn't see him again.