Arcane Guardian ↣ Avenged Sevenfold

32 ☼ secondhand

sorry for the lack of updates lol my mom died

FEBRUARY 2009 

"I knew you weren't dead. I just knew it." He turned around as fast as he could to grab her. He squeezed her harder than he had ever, ever squeezed her before, grabbing her hair in one hand and the small of her back in another. He didn't even realize he was sobbing into her. "I knew you weren't dead." 

"I am dead, Brian," She made her best attempts at not crying. She rubbed his back gently. She was exhausted. She had no idea it was that hard to make human connections to the mortal world. And she somehow knew he was the only person she could connect to. It was like her skin was being dunked in ice cold water and she was jumping out of her own body. "I'm dead."

"No you're not, because there's a chance we can get you back. We just have to break down the barrier somehow." He said, not looking up, just grabbing her and rocking her in his lap. She tried to feel reassured but she somehow couldn't. "My sister?"

"She's over here with me. She mainly watches over Jim though. He's not doing great." 

"Not doing great?" 

"You're not the only one with bad habits, Bri. Jim needs someone, as much as it's like him to be a hermit for a few months." She said. "You need to take care of him." 

"I can't even take care of myself."

"Yeah, clearly." She glanced at the knife spitefully. "Would you have wanted me to kill myself if the roles were reversed? Or would you want me to live a long, happy life?" 

"I'm not as strong as you are." 

"That's bullshit." She hissed. "You spent centuries in purgatory. You're one of the strongest people I know."

"Has she..." Brian realized, trailing off as he pulled back from her. "Has she hurt you, Ells?" 

Noelle didn't respond, just looking away and holding his hand with both of hers. 

"Answer the question." 

Noelle still didn't answer, her breath short. 

"Answer the fucking question!" Brian snapped. "Has Thellessany hurt you?" 

She nodded quietly, as Brian lifted up her shirt and saw a slash down her ribs, nearly identical to his. "It's kind of her brand," She said nervously, wincing as he traced it with a finger. "It doesn't hurt worse than when she killed me though. I don't know if you've ever had your heart pierced with rusty metal while it's still beating but reliving it every day isn't fun."

"So she did kill you." He nodded, feeling his soul fill with the most mind numbing skin heatening anger he had ever felt. "It was her." 

A look graced her eyes like she remembered something. "I know how she died." Brian's eyes widened too. "She lied to Mandy. It's... Brian, her soul is nine." 

"Her soul is fucking dead the minute I see her."

"I'm not saying she doesn't deserve as much pain as us ten times over. I'm saying the way she died was fucking awful." She shook her head. Brian took her hand in his and held it up to his face, warming it with his breath the same way she would all those years ago. "Tongue cut out. Eyes gouged out. The slit ribs, like us. And her throat tore out. In that order. You can't fuck up one part of the order or she won't die."