All Is Not Lost

Chapter 20

I Thank God

I thought the constant need of waking up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom is the worst.

Mayroon pa palang mas higit.

I woke up in the middle of the night again, in agony and in constant desire for something. I looked at my boyfriend beside me, sleeping soundly and unaware that I'll deprive him of his sleep once again but for a different reason.

I prepared for something to say to him... an explanation of why I woke him up, but all I could think about is because he was the only one who can give me what I need.

"Santi," I whispered and shook him a bit.

"Hmm?"

"I'm turned on."

Nagmulat ang mga mata niya at napatingin siya sa akin. Nakasimangot ako at hinihintay siyang tuluyang magising.

"What time is it?" His husky voice makes me feel a lot of things. Damn! I hate being pregnant!

I checked my phone on the side and saw that it was only one in the morning. I sighed and told him the time.

"Let's just sleep, love, okay?" aniya at niyakap ako.

He's probably tired from work and three hours from now, he needs to wake up and work again. Ayaw ko siyang pilitin pero nahihirapan ako sa sariling nararamdaman.

"I've been trying."

"I'll sing you a song until you fall asleep? How 'bout that?" he asked and stared at me. That's promising but I really need something right now.

"Ako na mag-top?" offer ko.

Kaagad siyang umiling. "Hell, no. You're pregnant."

"Please?"

"The doctor informed us that your sexual desire would be heightened but I never imagined it this way." Umiling ulit siya.

Bumuntonghininga ako at tumitig na lang sa kisame.

"Hey," untag niya sa akin. "I'm just more scared now to do it with you because you're pregnant... paano 'pag naipit natin si baby?"

"We won't..." I whispered and pulled him closer when he leaned in for a kiss.

Dahan-dahan siyang pumaibabaw sa akin. I thought he was kidding when he said he was scared, but throughout the process, he was way gentler and slower than he was before. He was really scared.

Nakatulog din ako, sa wakas, matapos namin makatatlo. Nang magising ako sa umaga, nakapasok na siya sa trabaho at may lutong breakfast na.

Our midnight activities differ from my sexual desires, sudden cravings, and cramps.

Hindi naman gaano kalaki ang tummy ko kaya wala pang nakakapansin sa work.

Daddy's the usual. Busy pa rin siya lagi at ang stress ay naibubunton sa mga staff. Seeing him always mad at work makes me think that I'm not the only reason why he's mad.

My weeks went on as usual. Napapadalas ang pagsundo sa akin ni Santi sa trabaho para sabay na kaming umuwi at maghapunan.

Na-sort na rin niya ang mga vitamins na kailangan kong inumin lagi. I tend to forget them kaya nag-set na ako ng alarm sa cellphone.

One time after we had our dinner, dumaan kami ni Santi sa mall para mag-grocery. We were walking to the grocery store when my eyes suddenly caught a specific kind of clothes.

I halted on my tracks because my mind started to imagine how would I look with it. Huli ko na nang mapagtanto na tinitingnan na rin ni Santi ang tinitingnan ko.