𝘍𝘰𝘳𝘣𝘪𝘥𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘓𝘰𝘷𝘦

𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘐 𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘐 𝘚𝘦𝘦 𝘈 𝘚𝘱𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘐𝘯 𝘔𝘺 𝘙𝘰𝘰𝘮 𝘉𝘶𝘵 𝘐𝘵'𝘴 𝘑𝘶𝘴𝘵 2 𝘓𝘢𝘥𝘺𝘣𝘶𝘨𝘴 𝘍𝘷𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨

ALVIN'S POV:

Stepping out of the cab with my hands in the air, I see almost every form of the military is here. Quiplash walks over to me and handcuffs my hands together. "Oh, I'm sorry, I'm not really a bondage guy," I say with a nervous smile. "Shut it, little man. Alvin Seville, you are under arrest," Quiplash tells me, taking me into a cop car.

"You can't be serious, this is all a big mis-" "Whatever you say, can and will be used against you in a court of law," Officer Draculaura said. Flabbergasted, I stay silent, pondering what's going on. Sloppy Nuts just drove off, they must have some sort of past with the cops.

TIME SKIP

I sit in the investigation room. "Alright, move it, skanks," a lanky short man with a weird outfit walks in. "Hello, Alvin, I'm detective Ranpo, I work with the ada, perhaps you've heard of me," he introduces, sticking his hand out that's covered in crumbs he must've not whipped off.

"The ada? So you work with the man who stole my friend's husband?" I ask looking up at him. (Chuuya's mine bitch back off Dazai, find someone else, fucking omega) "Dazai? Yeah he didn't take it well when Chuuya told him he wanted to go back to a emo-skank-hair-dyed-mommy-and-daddy-issues-mentally-ill girl with 'average Chuuya d rider' in her tiktok bio," Ranpo said chewing on his toenails.

"Anyways, where are you keeping Daddy Yankee?" he asked, swallowing a nail. That's what this is about? It's not even true. "Listen, I'm a silly little omega and silly little omegas do silly little omega activities," I try to reason. "Stealing military property is a silly little omega activity," he says, grabbing his pinky toes, getting ready to bite that nail too.

"No it's not-" "Pitbull did it." "Pitbulls an omega?" "He's very open about it," he responds, biting off the nail. "Alvin, you do realize stealing military property can get you up to 10 years in jail, right? Just tell the truth," Ranpo commands, twirling his big toe nail.

"I don't have my kid, in fact I don't have any of my kids. I forgot them at the airport-" "Wow, you're an awful dad and an even more awful omega." "I was running away from their father okay?!?!?" "You're not defending your case well," he tells me. Whatever I told him what happened.

"I don't know, call the airport and report a missing persons report, I just want my kids back and to see my family," I suggest. He get's pissy at the idea of doing work and throws his big toe nail at me. Unfortunately, it landed in my mouth and unfortunately, I'm an omega and omega's are used to swallowing so I swallowed his juicy moldy toenail.

"Absolutely not, go to the jail cell, young man," he commands, pointing at a cell. A guard escorts me to the cell and I take a look at my cellmates. "Gon? What are you doing here?" "I got caught trying to vote in Ohio," he tells me with a sad look on his face. I look over and see Honey-senpai.

"What did you do now?" "They found out about it all, man. The weed on the plane, murder, slight possible genocide, beating women, height manipulation, and a lot of war crimes. The list goes on forever," he says, eating cake with a cheeky smile.I see Deepthroat and Sloppy Nuts sulking in the corner.

"Tax evasion in Canada again?" They nod their heads in shame. I hear loud clanky footsteps coming towards me. "Alvin Seville, your family has paid your bail," the guard says unlocking the door. Thank Zoro. I'll have to apologize to Dave later, but I can at least sleep somewhere other than a musty cell with these gay halogens.   

I look up and see Levi with eight baby fucking carriers. "We need to talk."

A/N: Short chapter Ik and it's boring and unfunny asf but I needed to write these before I forgot them. Also this story may seem short but it's 44 pages, single spaced, Ariel 11 on a google doc sooooo Also Deepthroat, I will always remind you of that ugly photo of J*cks