I Kissed a Boy [complet]

The Doors Slam

NOTE : From this chapter, it is the last part of the story. Pay attention, I tried to distill clues. It's a bit darker part. Hope you like this ending. Another ten chapters. Good reading

_____________________________________

Gavin didn't immediately realize something was wrong. After the weekend at the mansion, the pace of work had intensified further. They left very early in the morning, returned very late in the evening. Marc chained photo shoots, interviews, drama lessons, singing sessions with and without the group, work on albums, commercials and specialized variety shows. He and his band were everywhere, in every médias. As soon as he appeared somewhere it was almost a riot. Peter and Gavin had hired a team of bodyguards and each member of the group had their own. In addition to the bodyguard, there were more and more professionals gravitating around them. A regular driver, an assistant to carry things, several people now managed communication and social networks. An official fan club had been created. The fans called themselves the "Heliotropes" because the fans followed Marc, identified by the media as "the Sun" . The unofficial fan club that shipped him and Marc, the "Air Nations" had taken on a lot of importance as well. He too had to be careful when he was in public. Now it was customary for fans to ask permission, or not, to take pictures of him. Several major brands had approached him to represent them. His tall stature, his grace and his natural beauty had a lot to do with his smile and his even-temperedness did the rest. He was learning to manage his stress and that of Marc. Marc, whom he discovered hypersensitive outside of work.

Indeed, they lived together at one or the other to avoid unnecessary travel while taking care not to be photographed. It was not a married life but a roommate. They got to know each other on a daily basis. It's not that there weren't tender gestures or intimate moments, but their crazy lives no longer allowed them the luxury of wasting hours of sleep. What Gavin discovered is that Marc had an immense need for contact which allowed him to reassure and calm down. During the day, he was under constant tension, a nervous tension that he inflicted on himself to get everything done quickly so once at their place, he was physically breaking down and Gavin had found him crying several times. Gavin took a little more of himself to console him by cradling him in his arms or letting him express his need to have him constantly close to him. What Marc learned was that Gavin was silent and rarely expressed his feelings openly. The young manager took a lot on himself and kept all his troubles and weaknesses inside. If there was negative feedback or unfounded and virulent criticism against Marc or the band, he kept it to himself. Gavin analyzed everything and took into account as many parameters as possible, that's what made him a good manager. There were times when his body was so tense that he couldn't move. Marc couldn't even touch him, even for a massage because any touch was painful for Gavin.

They lived together yet there was no more sex between them. Too tired, too nervous, not the moment, not the desire... Just spending time doing nothing, exhausted by the day, cuddling lazily and sleeping in each other's arms. Their feelings expressed themselves differently. Still no words but daily actions. They took care of each other sometimes to excess. Bloodshed and arguments also began. Even though Gavin knew that Marc's job encouraged him to reveal his body, he didn't like it. In those moments, he hated everyone, everyone who looked at Marc as if he was delicious with their eyes as sticky as snails. He hated the make-up artists who touched him, the stylists who saw him half-naked, the show presenters who teased him about his celibacy and the " ideal girl" while knowing that the truth was quite different. He hated fans who would scream whenever he showed a little too much skin or moved a little too sensually. He hated Marc who played along and he hated himself for these thoughts. He treated Marc with silence thereafter. All his insecurities swallowed and impossible to express. He wanted to hit him, hurt him so that he felt the pain too...so instead the doors were slamming. Marc, constantly on edge, couldn't stand Gavin's austerity towards him. He couldn't stand Gavin ignoring him and paying more attention to someone other than himself. He couldn't stand him cutting off a conversation or a quiet moment to answer the phone. The singer suffered from being rejected even though he knew it was for him, his career, his future. He had a hard time seeing Gavin smile at another person, even professionally. He had a panic fear that Gavin would realize he wasn't good enough for him, that Gavin would leave him. And when the manager pushed him away when they were at work, looking at him with his cold eyes to force him to keep his distance and focus on what he was doing, it hurt Marc deeply. Their arguments were explosive especially as they had to restrain themselves from having them in their workplace. As soon as the door of the apartment was crossed, the reproaches rained down in both directions. The tension was so strong that sometimes the objects also flew. Arguments without real foundations, just to release the tensions and frustrations of the day. The reproaches had no solid basis, no real grudge. They were screaming horrors to make the other react, to tell him " I am here, I exist, see me, listen to me, understand me, accept me, love me ". The apartments were too small, forcing one or the other to leave the accommodation to get some fresh air and calm down.