Against all odds

Chapter 43

As the text was loading, I took another deep breath hyper aware of all the mistakes I could have made in that exam room. Fuck I breathed as it kept loading.

should i- ? Max asked noticing my distress.

Please. I handed him the phone.

Okay it says bla bla bla. Oh Alex, i-! he put a hand over his mouth.

My heart dropped. I didnt make it. What am I even good at anymore. Fuck what do I do now? Im the worst daughter. My dad would be so disappointed. Tears welled up in my eyes. I couldnt look at him.

98%?! Fuck me! I knew you were smart but not that smart! he cheered.

What? I whispered looking over at him.

You did it! Oh god congrats! he cheered again.

I did? I still couldnt believe it.

They expect you at the graduation on Monday. He smiled.

Thank you, Max. I said and he pulled me in for a hug.

Youre so welcome.

I have to go now, or Ill miss my flight. See you in Russia?

Take care. See you then.

Drive back carefully please.

I will. Now go. He laughed.

The flight was okay, and I had Chris pick me up. And drive me home. I waited till all my siblings were in bed till I broke the news.

Theres something I havent told you yet. I

I know. Whats up? he asked leaning back on the couch.

RedBull threw me out and I just dont know what to do now. I already did the maths and the money I get from them will last us a little, but I really need to find another seat because I dont know how else we can keep up this situation. Im so sorry Chris, I know you work your butt off for this family and I just cant contribute to this, and I really should be but I just dont know what else to do. Im not really good at anything else and you need to finish uni too but how will you have the time for that when I cant provide the money for you guys to live? I just- I dont- I got embraced in a warm hug.

Its okay. Theres nothing you could have done. I still have most of the money you sent me last time and Itll last us till end of the year. Well figure this out. We always do. Together.

I know I just thought I could do better for you. Ill try to land a reserve driver seat for next season, but I cant promise anything and since Im out of the RB juniors as well I wont get any money if I dont get one.

Its okay. Well figure this out. You just look for an opportunity once the news is out and then if you dont find one, well figure something out. He said calmingly.

Im so sorry. I whispered putting my head on his shoulder.

Its okay. I know you didnt mean to.

It was graduation day and I got woken up by Emilia cuddling up to me. I dont know what time it was, but the sun was just rising. I sleepily pulled her closer to me and she giggled softly.

Youre awake early. I mumbled.

Couldnt sleep. Can I help you get ready today?

Of course. Id love that. How about we make some hot chocolate and stay in bed for a little while longer?

We spent the morning in bed cuddling and watching our favourite cartoons till I had to get up to eat breakfast before I went to do my hair.

I put my front pieces in two thick braids and let the rest of my hair remain in its curly form. Lastly, I pulled some face-framing strands out and did a more natural brownish smoky eye and red lipstick before letting Emi help me into my black flowy dress.

When I was done, I went downstairs to get another cup of coffee. Looking good. Chris said as he stood in front of the mirror fighting with his tie. Thanks. Dont look too bad yourself. Hold this please. I said giving him my cup before fixing the knot in his tie.

Will you put on my bracelets? I asked holding the up.

Cap and gown? Chris asked as we got to the car.

In the back. Hop in everyone. I said putting the key into the ignition.

We arrived and I got out with all my siblings. I met Lisa in the parking lot and just as I wanted to go inside Chris phone started to ring.

Ill be right there. I just have to take this.

I got my sibling situated in their seats before going to the other graduates and waiting for the ceremony to be over. As my principal gave a speech, I went through my mental list of things I had already packed and things I still hadnt put in my suitcase for my flight to Sochi tonight. Then the principal finally started calling the names of the graduates to hand them their diploma.

Miss Alexandra Verena Azia Mazozi Eleena Duman has finished her Bachelors degree at the young age of nineteen. She also has full marks on every subject. Congratulations! I got up and walked onto the stage where I took my diploma and when I posed for the photo, I saw a few all too familiar faces siting in the crowd cheering me on.

As I went off the stage again to take my place, I couldnt wait for the ceremony to be over. Luckily it was split in half due to covid so I only had do wait through the students with the last names starting with A-M and the ones from N-Z would be held on another day.

The graduation was coming to an end and as I scored the highest on the exams, I had to give a speech. When it was time, I walked up the steps and took my place in front of the microphone.

Nine hours of studying and I cant remember my own name, but I can remember how to kill a man with my toothbrush

I remember texting these exact words to my best friend two weeks ago when I was studying for the final exam day. I would have never thought I would say such a thing as I was always too scared to admit that I was struggling. But not too long ago a good friend, who by now consider an unbiological brother, has taught me that I can admit it. Its okay to wear your heart on your sleeve, laugh like you dont believe in bad things and joke like youve never been sad.

Were all just a portrait of the people we love and theres nothing else that tastes so bittersweet. A little dash of my best friend in the way I walk or laugh, my scarf tied in a double knot for that beautiful stranger at the bus stop. A whisper of my mother and the sighs of a long-lost lover in the way I braid my hair. Pockets full of fire, warmth and security like my dad, or his dad, or his dad. The tilt of my jaw, the curve of my smile, the way I question everything twice before believing it, everything, each one, is someone else. And when theyre all gone the mosaic, I see in my reflection will be the biggest ghost I have.

We are not all in the same boat here in this world. Were facing the same storm. Some of us are in Yachts, some in rowboats and some are clinging onto driftwood. Were all in this together. Yes, but we arent facing the same circumstances. So chose to love like youve never been hurt, laugh like youve never been sad. Walk like you own the place or like you dont care who does.

We all have something great in store for us. Be you. Be great and dont give up. May you be the most beautiful part in peoples mosaic. Thank you for going on this journey with me and being part of my mosaic. I said as I investigated the faces of my classmates. When I stepped back to leave the stage, they erupted in applaud.