Friendships Desires and Secrets

Just Good Mornings

Jungkook was dreaming. There was a soft warm light across his face and chest. His heart slowly picking up speed. He was floating on the water, gentle current sweeping him away, away, away from something. He opened his eyes and blinked a few times. He didn't know where he was until he looked down. Amy was snuggled into his side, her arm draped across his abs, her head in the crook of his arm.

He took a deep breath and stared at her in wonderment. She stirred a little, pulling her leg up and tucking it around his leg. As he watched her, something was growing inside his chest. He lay there deep in thought. He wanted to stroke her face but didn't want to wake her up. His eyes widened and his heart picked up speed. Was he in love?

He had liked girls before, but it didn't feel like this. This was a tenderness towards her, like he wanted to use his body to surround her and protect her. He wanted to see himself in her eyes and see her face light up when she saw him like she did at the restaurant. She inhaled deeply in her sleep, and he started to watch the rise and fall on her chest. He surrendered something of himself in the watching of her. Hearing her breathe, feeling her dream.

He knew he had to get up, knew he had to get to his place and change to go to his parents. He couldn't move, couldn't close his eyes. He finally stopped fighting the urge to stroke her hair when a loose strand fell over his view. He tucked the stray lock behind her ear, and she smiled. Such a sweet moment that he savored it on the tip of his tongue like the perfect wine.

She twitched in her dreaming. He wondered what faraway place she now lived in, what her surroundings were like until she said his name softly. If you could dip a word in love and gift it to someone, she just had. His name was literally that gift. Jungkook rolled his eyes to her ceiling, fighting the sudden tears that sprung up. The pressure in his chest was taking his breath until those tears crashed down.

His eyes fluttered closed. He thought he was imagining things when he felt her arm tighten, but when he looked down, she was moving up to wrap him in her embrace.

"What's wrong?" She asked softly. He shook his head and wouldn't look at her, glancing to the small window. "Are you upset you came here?"

That got his attention. "No! Why would you...I mean how, just no." He pulled her to him, holding her tightly in his well-toned embrace, inhaling the sweet scent of her hair. How could he just tell her? He gathered her up so that her whole body was curled into his and let go.

The loneliness fell in tears.

The empty years filled with each breath she breathed.

The fear he held so close that it kept everyone away, melted in her light.

***

Tara sat straight up. The sun was high in the sky and a freezing breeze was blowing the curtain into the room. Yoongi stood on the balcony with a cup of coffee in his sweater paws. What far away thing had caught his eye, she didn't know. She wrapped herself in the comforter and padded to the open window.

"Baby, it's freezing."

He didn't respond to her but kept his focus on some far away point.

"Yoongi?"

"Sorry Jagi? What?" He turned to her, his eyes focusing on the present.

"Where did you go?"

"Nowhere important."

"It's freezing in there." She pointed back beyond the curtain.

"I was burning up. Sorry Tala." He kissed her and moved past her into the apartment. "Do you want coffee?"

"Maybe in a minute." She shut the glass door and crawled back into the bed, shivering.

He turned up the heater and sat next to her.

"When do you have to meet your parents?" she reached out and pet his back.

"Tomorrow. I was thinking, why don't you come with me?"

"T-to meet your family?"

"You don't want to." He looked down at the rug next to the bed. It wasn't a question, but he didn't think she was ready for that. Her answer next, stunned him.

"Of course, I want to!" She was grinning ear to ear. "I didn't think you wanted me to meet them, so I never said anything."

He nodded, smiling and crawled across the bed to be level with her and kissed her. He leaned back and held her eyes for a moment, feeling emotion rising. "Can I give you your gift now?"

"If I can give you yours also."

"Sure sure!" He nodded.

She got off the bed and went to the tree in the living room, hurrying back with a large black box with a sparkling and ornate bow that wrapped the package width and lengthwise. He hurried and tore at the box like a child. He had wanted to see what it was for weeks. He pulled out a heavy black bundle wrapped in tissue and looked up at her.

"Jagi! Is this the jacket I said I liked." Tara nodded happily. He tore the tissue away and ran his fingers slowly down the supple leather. "This was so expensive." He said so softly to himself that she almost didn't hear him. He sat the coat aside and hopped off the bed and opened the closet door, reaching in the pocket of his old essentials hoodie and pulled out a tiny box.

Tara's heart stopped.

He handed her the red velvet box and waited for her to open it.

***

Alex came out of Namjoon's bathroom and leaned against the door jam, watching him sleep soundly. He slept so much harder when she stayed with him, his soft snores filling her heart with happiness. She could live her life in these moments. His undisturbed and natural self. His simple perfection. He wasn't easy, but nothing worth having was ever easy.

She replayed this past year. The picnic came first, and that sudden rainstorm that had caught the two lovers unawares. They hadn't run in, but had remained for a while, loving each other in the storm. Lunch completely forgotten. When they had finally made it inside, their drenched possessions under the eve of the cottage, he had scooped her into his arms and carried her to the shower. She held him from behind, the hot water heating their chilled bodies and she had wept unseen, with happiness.

He reached for her in his sleep and another memory flooded her mind. They were riding their bikes along the Han and he had reached out for her hand. He kept looking back at her, making silly faces and noises, making her laugh so hard she could barely see the path. He had so many facets. She sighed softly and rubbed her arms.

He had stopped snoring. She knew he would wake soon. Like that day they had gone to the movies. That was the trip to Georgia. All her doubts had come to a head on that trip, the past ripping at her heart, tearing at her fears. So many memories. So much she wanted him to replace. She had broken down, shattered bits of who she was scattered all around the room like thousands of broken ornaments. Beautiful at the time, but shards that were cutting her apart. She knew then that every death led to this life, the only life she ever wanted. And that night, he was so tired that he had dozed off on her shoulder at the theater. She didn't have the heart to wake him, his perfect face so relaxed in dreaming. Alex watched him sleep. She didn't remember what the movie was about. Only his face.

That peaceful face he had now.

He slowly opened his eyes, a smile breaking across his features like the sun breaking over the sky. Nothing prepares you for the sort of love that she felt at that moment. That feeling of belonging so entirely to another person and they, belonging wholeheartedly and completely to you that it's frightening. She went to him, knowing that everything she'd been through, the trials by fire, were to make her the person that he needed most.

And she surrendered everything, knowing that his fragile heart was her greatest strength. Willing to relive her private hells, willing to walk through new ones to be safe in his love. Trusting that nothing could divide them.

Or so she thought.