Friendships Desires and Secrets

Compromise

Alex froze.

Brain empty, turning blue, eyes distant, stalled engine.

"Breathe baby." Joon said in a worried tone then snapped his fingers in front of her face and waved like they do on TV.

She came around and took a deep breath, staring at him in shock. Her brain was rapid-fire questioning her. Hadn't she been shook enough for one morning? How would that solve anything? Was this just desperation to hold on to her after the visitor this morning? Once she had narrowed all of this down to one question she asked him softly, "Does that fix it in your mind?" She didn't let him answer before continuing. "I just tell you that I'm not ready to move in and you tack on an impromptu proposal?"

"No! I- it wasn't, hang on." He stuttered, clambering quickly off the bed and coming back with something small in his large hand. "OK it may not have been how I saw it in my head, and yeah I sort of blurted it out without thinking, but I've actually had this about a week." From a small black velvet draw-string bag, he produced a sparkling tiara shaped ring with 7 small diamonds tented around a sapphire.

"I was going to wait till after the holiday like a Valentine's proposal. I know it's cliché. I was just trying not to screw things up."

Alex looked at the ring, her brows furrowing up as she remembered something. Something she had been embarrassed about and therefore, forgotten. "I have a ring for you too."
Now it was his turn to look shocked.
"I brought it with me from the states." She blurted out. "I bought it years ago when you were into turquoise. I even took it with me to New York, but I couldn't get close to you then."

He studied her a moment. "What were you going to say?"

"Say? I wrote a note. It's still in the pouch. I don't even remember what it says. I mean I didn't know if I was going to have time to say anything, you know."

He nodded. "Do you have it still?"

She turned bright red. "It's in my backpack. I never took it out."

He got up and retrieved her bag from the door of the closet where she always dropped it and brought it to her. In a tiny zipper compartment, sewn into the strap, was a grey pouch. It looked almost identical to the one he had given her, except the color. She handed it to him.

He opened the little satchel and pulled out a plastic baggie, a note and ring tucked safely inside. His eyes read the note quickly. It was half in Korean and half in English with her media contact information listed. The ring stunned him. The band was a heavy, polished metal, silver in color and was inlaid with two bands of wood with a band of turquoise nestled in between. "Alex, it's perfect." He said softly, his dampening eyes tracking up to meet her anticipatory ones. "Why did you never give it to me?"

"Fear? Shame? A silly fantasy that I would one day get to meet you. I didn't want to freak you out or for you to think I was just some fan girl wanting attention. I feel like it's a very 'fan girl' thing to have or give. I came here for you. To see you. I never in my wildest dreams thought that we would hit it off! All I have ever wanted is you. I just didn't know you existed back then, or once I did, that this could be."

Alex held the diamond engagement ring out to Namjoon, who looked confused. "You don't want it then?"

"No silly." She smiled, "I want you to put it on me!"

A child-like grin appeared on his face, and he took the ring from her, sliding it easily onto her ring finger. It was that perfect amount of snug, so you know it won't come flying off. Alex admired it on her finger, then looked up at Namjoon, beaming.

He took the ring she had given him and placed it on his own ring finger. "It looks like a wedding band almost."

"Wear it how you want babe. When I bought it, I knew that you couldn't wear it constantly, or may not want to."

"How did you know me so well, even back then."

"It's a mystery." She shrugged, not wanting to try to explain how she had always felt connected to him. How they had always had a connection because of how crazy she thought she sounded.

"So, you still really haven't answered my first question. Will you?"

"Promise me something?"

"Sure, what?"

"A long engagement."

That wasn't what he thought she was going to say. "Why?"

"I still have a lot to learn about myself Joonah. A lot of growing and healing to do. I need my own space and time alone."

He nodded that he understood. "Whatever you need baby. I promise."

She nodded. "Then yes," she answered, excitement bubbling up in her chest. "I would love to be yours forever." They embraced and didn't move for the longest time until he reminded her that they needed to go tell his parents.

A little more than an hour later, he was on his way to the other side of Seoul to see his parents. He knew his friend' Yong-hyun was planning a trip that way and had arranged to travel with him later that day, so he messaged his friend and asked if he could go sooner.

(Y) why the rush my brother?

(N) got to tell the parents the good news

(Y) you moving Moni in with you?

(N) no and that's a bad idea. He likes my mom too much

(Y) then what...

(N) I asked Alex to marry me

(Y) I spit out my coffee!

(N) ㅋㅋㅋㅋ 🤮😆

(Y) I can get you in about 20. Does your girl have a license?

(N) yeah, no car. Small place

(Y) she moving in?

(N) no. I'm trying to get her to

(Y) sounds like a good one. Glad I'm finally meeting her.

Namjoon clicked his phone closed and tossed it on the bed. "Yong-hyun will take us to the palace so we don't have to use a taxi."

"Maybe I should take a taxi though and meet you there."

"What for babe?"

"So I can get changed?" Alex wrinkled up her nose. "I can't wear this!"

"I wasn't thinking. You do need to go home obviously. Maybe we can get you a place closer? Like walking distance?"

"It would be a convenience, but the crazies would have more chances to figure out that we are together."

"One day I won't care anymore." He sighed. "But you are right. Maybe just a bigger place then. Preferably one with its own bathroom."

She laughed. "I don't know," she said in a sarcastic tone. "I sort of like having to wait in line to go."

He rolled his eyes. "I will have him drop you at home and meet you at my parents then. You know where the D palace is?"

She did, very well. "Yup, just not the number."

When Yong-hyun picked them up, she was pleasantly surprised. "Oh! I know you!" She smiled at him. "You're Eaeon!"

"Last time I looked in the mirror. But I try not to remind myself." He chuckled.

She liked him immediately.

***

Alex looked around the cramped space of the studio and sighed. Good sense told her that living with Joon was a Band-Aid to a bigger issue that she wasn't going to pursue. She really did need time and a space of her own for now. She changed clothes and sprayed herself with her favorite scent. Then she ran out and went to a store that was a block down and on a cramped one way, to a market and bought a bottle of wine and a melon to gift to Joon's parents. While she was checking out, she called a taxi and walked to the intersection to be picked up. In the quiet of the cab, she tried to calm her nerves.

By the time she had arrived, she was no calmer, but resolved to see things through, no matter what and as she entered the doors of D palace, she felt like she was finally realizing her future. Finally coming home.