so f*cking lonley - jinkook

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GUESS WHO'S BACK

this is a phone call oneshot so if you don't like speech be warned ... it's like all speech lolz

n e ways.....

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the days are long. and hard.

the bed has never been more cold - the apartment has never felt so empty.

jungkook is lonely.

so fucking lonely.

it's not been long since jin enlisted. a month maybe? or longer... the days all melt together. it's only a few days into january and already jungkook wants nothing more than for this year to be over.

whilst everyone else has just gotten their head down and worked through this difficult time - jungkook has found it impossible to get anything done. for the entire month before jin went away - he stayed at his hyung's apartment. sharing a bed like they did when he was just a kid and would get anxious in the night. watching movies, eating, laughing. it was heaven - but it ultimately resulted in hell, as jungkook managed to get himself so attached that now that jin is gone, it's like a piece of the maknae is missing too.

it's all quite dramatic. jin isn't dead or anything like that - he's just gone for a while. gone to serve the country like they will ALL eventually do. jin is just unlucky enough to be the first - having to tackle this brand new experience head on with no guidance. no one to lead him, no one to turn to.

a lump forms in jungkook's throat at the thought.

that day plays over and over in jungkook's head. seeing him with a shaved head - in his big jacket, ready to tackle arguably his toughest challenge yet... all alone.

he didn't say a word on the way there , or the way back for that matter. he hummed in agreement as jin made him promise that he would eat well and wash up. that he wouldn't push people away - but he had his eyes closed the whole time to save the tears from spilling out, and because he couldn't bring himself to look jin in the eye and lie to him. because he has broken all of his promises.

he hasn't been eating well. one tub of instant noodles a day and a few beers is the closest he's come to a "balanced diet" and a shower where all he does is stare blankly at the wall whilst cold water splashes on him doesn't really count either. he's really not taken this well. it's silly actually, because he knew it was coming. he's known for a while - but it still hurts more than words can say.

it's ten pm. it's dark outside, and a chill creeps in through the open window and up jungkook's spine - making him shiver. he should really get up and shut it , but what's the point?

his phone ringing disturbs the thick silence in the room. it's a random number. ignore.

it rings again. ignore.

when it rings for a third time - he answers, ready to yell down the phone and tell whoever to quit bothering him , and not to call this number again - but then a familiar voice soothes him instantly. he puts the phone to his ear.

"jungkookie? why are you ignoring your hyung? have you forgotten about me already?"

jungkook's throat is dry and he can't find any words to say. he swallows and opens his mouth to speak - but he doesn't. he just sits in silence, listening to the faint breathing from the other end of the line.

"jungkook, are you there?"

"hyung. jin hyung?"

"yes.. are you okay?"

no, he's not. but he can't even begin to let jin worry about him when he's got so much on his plate. he takes a deep breath and composes himself. he smiles as if jin can see him and gives a feeble laugh down the phone.

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