I'm sorry (A James Hetfield story)

Purify

As I got in between Denise's legs again, I was thinking to myself ah shit, I'll just ask her in the morning, I'll plan something later on, hopefully this will all work out for me and for Denise, and the band and we can get a medium size house, nothing too crazy, three bedrooms, two full bathrooms, and a full basement with a 5-car garage, well for my cars and bikes. 

"Are you okay?" Denise whispered up at me, yes, I am.

"Yeah, why?" I looked down at Denise and we both smiled.

"You have a strange look on your face, like you're up to something." well yeah. 

"Honestly, yes I am thinking of something, but uh it won't be until tomorrow." damn it James, just shut up and keep it to yourself!

"What won't be until tomorrow?" quick say something!

"I uh, I'm making you breakfast in bed." nice man.

"Well, that should be interesting to see." Yes, it will be.

"Can I ask you something?" don't do it now!

"Yeah, what is it?" marry me? no not now, tomorrow!

"What is it that you have always wanted in life?" this is an honest truthful question.

"Honestly, I want a house, maybe a few children, a man to hold me at night, and tell me everything is going to be okay, I want to be loved again and have hot passionate sex, technically I mean lovemaking, until the next day, I bet I would be too tired to do anything, I think hearing my future husband's heartbeat would be romantic and I wouldn't mind hanging around the house, making cool music, working from home, or my record store, either way it would be fine with me, I wouldn't care, does that answer your question?" holy shit, yes!

"You just answered what I've been wanting to hear for the past 25 years." I rolled off Denise, I did want to make love with Denise, but now I had too much on my mind, I didn't lose my drive, I just felt like it wasn't going to be the right time, to make love, while I was over thinking. 

"What happened the last 25 years James?" lots, of what I can't put into words. 

"Lots, from getting married, having babies, being thrown out of my own house, drinking heavily night after night, being torched in the early 90's, losing a few friends, there's lots more that I'm missing, that was my past." and you are my future! I love her.

"All that, must have taken courage to go through, I mean, I don't know if I would have been able to go through all that, minus the getting married part and having babies, you seem to be still worn out." honestly, sometimes it feels like that, but as we get older, it will be worse.

"Yeah, something like that, are you sure I haven't met you before?" you never know.

"No, we have a 20-year age difference, and besides, I never told you this before, but my parents passed away at a young age, so I don't have family, I guess you can say, that I had to mature at a young age, but I got through it." see you seem to get me, and I understand you a well.

"Yeah, I hear you." I rolled on my side to face Denise, and I took her hand in mine and I kissed it for a moment, we both inhaled for a moment, then the doorbell rang, oh good God!

"I should get it." no, I will, stay here in bed.

"I will get it, stay here in bed, because when I come back, I want to hold you and talk to you." honestly that is what I want to do, with you, I rolled out of bed and I wrapped the sheet around my waist, I was too lazy to put my boxers back on, so I walked to the door and guess who that was, really people, leave me the hell alone, for a like a few days, I walked to the door, to see who it was and it was my kids, oh what do they need?