I'm sorry (A James Hetfield story)

Social Tendencies

the next day Tuesday June 8th, 2022

I got up the next morning thinking, will this be the rest of my life? getting up every morning, checking on the babies, making breakfast for Denise and the kids? going out every now and then, touring? this is not what I pictured my life to be at almost 59. I pictured myself, to be still happily married to Fran and have the kids out. And the beginning of last year things were great, the kids were out, and I had Fran to myself, but that suddenly changed, I wasn't happy, and I was depressed but about what? Did I really just fuck up my marriage with Fran? Or what that a sign of something else? It's too late to go back, because I already created a life with Denise, and we are having triples, that are on their way. I'm not saying I want to go back with Fran, but I'm starting to feel a little guilty but at the same time I wasn't happy, she would nag at me for bullshit stuff, I can admit, I wasn't the easiest to get along with or put up with but damn it, I was a man! Fran knew what she was getting herself into, so it's her own fault and same with me. But with Denise, it's totally different, we are both in different parts of our lives, and I'm more stable, Denise is younger than me, but I don't give a shit what anyone says, I feel like Denise is mature, if I thought she was just a "kid" and acted like a dumbass, then I never would of thought once to grab onto her and be with her, I love Denise, she loves me, and that's that. It won't matter how many times Lars or Jason tries to flirt with Denise or hit on her, because I will always win.

"Jamie? What are you doing?" I guess I was in a daze and thinking, because Denise walked into the kitchen, I just made a pot of coffee, she sat next to me at the kitchen table, we smiled.

"Nothing, just thinking." Oh man, you should tell her what's on your mind.

"About what?" I took Denise's hand I blushed.

"Thinking about my past life with Fran, I love you, but I feel bad on what happened between her and I, but at the same time, it wasn't going that well, but come here." I took Denise's hand, and I pulled her on my lap, and I caressed Denise's face, we kissed passionately for a moment.

"Yeah, go on." Oh okay, I will and that's it.

"Then I found you and everything changed, my problems went away, and the air cleared itself, I love you Denise, it's like, I don't know, maybe I met you in a past life or something." It's true.

"Maybe, but I love you, Jamie." Aw baby, it's James! But I don't care right now. I took Denise's hand, and we walked over to the couch, I put the TV on, and we watched some car show, Denise is my kind of woman, she's very cool, I love her and she's adorable, the way how she talks to the babies still inside of her, makes me smile but almost cry. It was going to be a long 4 months!