Secrets Pierre Gasly

Chapter 31

Pierre's POV

It probably wasn't the smartest idea of mine, but I just knew I had to follow her, knowing well she would be going away from the track to avoid me, I didn't even change into my race suit, I just told everyone I wasn't feeling well and needed to go home, So I waited for her in the parking lot, and yes I followed her to her hotel. I watched her rush in, I just sat in the car for a little while trying to figure out if it would really be a good idea to go after her, after a good 30 minutes of battling with myself, I got out of my car going inside getting the room number from the receptionist, I take a deep breath before knocking on the door, a few seconds later the door opens, but I don't see anyone till I tilt my head down my eyes meeting a little boy. "You are not Arty," he says looking up at me with wide eyes. My eyes run over the little guy.

He looked so familiar, His eyes, they are the same color as mine, and his hair too, and his little nose looks exactly like Sarah's my mind becomes cloudy as millions of thoughts run through it, Could he? Could he be my kid? Was this the reason she left and has been gone for the last 3 years? I mean he looked around 3. The timeline lined up, she hid my son from me. My eyes meet hers, she just stands there frozen not saying a word. If we are being honest I couldn't say anything either. My mind got clouded by anger as I was yelling at her.

She was backing away from me again, I see as she silently cries, her eyes filled with tears, my anger took over my body and I scared her, she was never scared of me before, I take a few steps back calming my heart rate trying to calm my nerves down. She was planning to keep the fact that I have a son a secret forever, my mind was going crazy I have not known about the fact that I had a fucking kid in the world for three years. My voice leaves me again as my mind fills with sadness about losing three years, No I can't wrap my head around that. She is just standing there crying, but I can't get myself to go over to her.

My mind is running faster than my car, the argument with Lando, he was talking about Emily, he said she saw something but she never finished her sentence, Did she lie to me? Why would've she done that? Did she see Ollie? But- I had to ask it. Why did she make up that whole story? I feel as if my legs want to go out under me. My emotions catching up to me now quietly literally overwhelming me, I feel my eyes fill up with tears quickly rolling down my cheeks, I try to control myself feeling Charle's presence beside me gripping my shoulders.

I look at myself in the bathroom mirror, I was a fucking mess, my eyes slightly red and puffy from the crying and my hair all over the place, I wash my face for a good three minutes straight feeling myself regaining some self-control. I hear her sobbing from outside, I hated when she cried I always fucking hated seeing or hearing her cry. I take a few more minutes to gather my thoughts before walking out.

He looked so adorable, he showed me all his little cars, I was amazed at how a few guys from the paddock gifted him their car models. I was trapped in a trance listening to him talk about the cars, he liked carting, it was slightly crazy how much he was like me despite me not being near him ever or so I thought, he was there in Monaco at the carting track, I truly wondered how many times was I close to meeting him before. Sarah led him to his room tucking him in, I stood at the doorway eavesdropping over them. He saw Sarah was sad, I did too, and it was all my fucking fault.

I tense up as I see and hear Lando at the door. Honestly, I didn't know why I was so angry at him. I guess it was the fact he was just still on perfectly good terms with Sarah and they just got along so well without problems, they were always best friends, and now they seemed closer than ever something was just different. Or I was just being petty and trying to make myself feel better, I couldn't decide but he was right, I lied to Sarah and she didn't deserve that.

I try to stumble and look at her the whole way we are eating the food. I had to tell her because what I did was wrong and I knew it. Blaming my shit performance on her was the most stupid thing I have ever done. Letting everyone make me believe that I was better off alone without Sarah was the biggest bullshit. She was always my biggest supporter, my rock, and my person she always trusted me and I broke it because I am fucking idiot who can't see. And once again I made her cry. Those beautiful green eyes were filled with tears, because of me, I was the reason she was crying again, seems like that's the only thing I do to her now,

"what are you going to do about Emily?" she asks me. That's a fantastic question, I had no idea. I love Emily I do, I can't help it, she helped me a lot in the past year. But she lied to me. Big time making me question if she really does love me or if she has a different agenda. I have to go back to my hotel. I stand up and just look at her not knowing what my next step could be. I pull her into my arms resting my head on top of hers. I broke the girl I loved, the girl I called my soulmate at a point in my life. Was I angry with her? Yes, but the thing was, we both fucked up major time.

I quickly rush to my car locking the door on myself. I grip the steering wheel before hitting it slightly as things finally start to settle down in my head. Everyone has been lying to me for years, I have a son, a fucking son. My emotions take over me once again as I let out a few sobs. Fuck.

This is not gonna be easy

Okay this chapter is completely different than any before IK, I just wanted to give some of Pierre's mind. Honestly, I was slightly high on meds as I wrote this still so lols.  Tbh it kind of just a filler shorter chapter :/

Also I got released from the hospital in the afternoon so yay :) I basically slept for 13 hours straight from the meds which honestly was much needed lol. The meds I got were STRONG lol.

ALSO THANK YOU FOR 66K READS, YOU GUYS ARE AMAZING!!!

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