Oblivious

3 // Annoyed Sigh

Petrichor
(n.) the scent of  fresh rain on dry earth

-Elora-

I push the trolley down the next aisle, glancing at the list to see that I need to grab a loaf of bread.

I look away from the list too late, the trolleys has already been rammed into the only other person in aisle. Freckles.

They stumble back, swearing under their breath. My apologies fall short when they turn around to glare at me, I know that glare.

Elijah.

Elijah groans to himself muttering something along the lines of  'of course it's you.'

I smile brightly at him. Glad someone familiar is here. "Hi Elijah."

Elijah doesn't smile back, doesn't say hi either, just stares blankly at me. Blinking occasionally.

Shuffling awkwardly on my feet I try and think of ways to continue to conversation. "Are you here shopping too?" I feel myself deflate, of course he's shopping that's why he's holding a basket. I wish I was better at talking to people.

Elijah stares at me as though I'm stupid. I can't help but feel small under his gaze. I shift my eyes to his feet, nervously picking at the skin around my fingers. "Forget that I asked that, of course your here shopping."

The boy releases a sigh that tells me he's entirely feed up with this pathetic attempt of a conversation. "Do you maybe want to shop together?"

I don't look at him, scared he's going to say no. He's probably going to say no then I'm going to be left standing here awkwardly feeling stupid for even asking. I still hope he says yes.

Why is making friends so hard?

Why can't it be as easy as it was in primary? Where you can just walk up to someone and demand to be friends. That was a easier time.

When the silence stretches too long I glance up to see Elijah walking away.

I follow after him. Glad he didn't say no. He seems like the type to say no to something he doesn't want to do. Which hopefully means he does want to shop with me otherwise he would've said no, right?

Elijah isn't one for talking, that much is obvious, that's probably why he walked away without saying yes. Because he thinks that I'll follow him and I do.

I deflate a little more inside when Elijah sigh once I've caught up with him. It's an annoyed sigh, one I've received a countless number of times before. It's easily recognisable, especially when it settles it's self deep within me, eating away at myself confidence like it does every time I'm on the receiving end of it.

But it's okay I remind myself. He just needs time to get used to me that's all. I'm really not that much to handle when you've gotten used to me.

It's a futile attempt to make myself feel better. It fails like it has done every other time I've repeated it to myself. But I'll continue to say it to myself every time I receive that sigh. Soon I might even believe it.

He would've said no, right?

❤︎

It's tiring trying to maintain a conversation with someone who only huffs and puffs at everything you say. That's if they don't completely blank you.

It stung at first. But maybe Elijah's just not in the mood for talking. Maybe he's just having a bad day that's all.

I'm really not too much. I hope I'm not too much.

Following silently along side Elijah I keep reminding myself that it's better than being alone.

That at-least there's someone next to me. Keeping me company. Even if we don't talk or aren't doing anything particularly fun.

Company is company.

Beggars can't be choosers after all.

Coming to stop at Elijah's car I help him put his bags in the boot. Once everything is in I turn around prepared to walk away.

Not bothering to say bye because it'd be embarrassing if he didn't say it back.

Focusing on my feet in order not the step on the cracks I begin the walk home. Mama won't be home yet. Probably not for another few hours.

"Are you walking home?" I spin around to face Elijah to see him leaning on the top of his car, one perfect eyebrow raised in question.

I nod at his question. The corner of my lips tilting up pathetically. He nods back, gets into his car and drives away without a word.

Not much of a talker.

I spin back around on the balls on my feet. Feeling happier then I did this morning. Glad I ran into Elijah because even if we didn't talk all that much it was better then spending the whole day alone.

I'd rather do nothing with someone then do nothing by myself.

My tilted lips turn up into a full smile when the first splash of rain hits the pavement.

I like the rain. Well not really the rain, but the after math of the rain.

The soaked grass that sprinkles when pumpkin walks through it. The fresh smell. The way the drops colour the pavement. As if painting a fresh start. The little creatures hiding under small flowers.

I hate the aspect of being in the rain though. The way my clothes drip and slow me down. My straightened hair becoming frizzy. My mascara running.

I love the rain but I hate being caught in it.

I stop dead in my tracks when a car drives through the puddle next to me. Completely drenching me. Freckles.

My clothes become heavy. I feel cold and miserable and all I want to do is sit on the floor and cry. I don't. That would be embarrassing.

Shaking my head, I hold both bags in one hand, using my now free hand to wipe my dripping mascara. Releasing a sigh because that's all I'm really able to do.

Looking up I notice the car has stopped just after the puddle and Elijah has half his body stuck out the door. Signalling with his head for me to join him.

I do.

~