valentine's day

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It's Valentines day. I can't stop thinking about Eleanor and Livi and I hope I get hit by a car. Why is Livi so miserable? I don't understand, if I was her I'd be the happiest person on earth. Eleanor still texts me sometimes. She wants a friend. How do I tell her I don't want to be their friend, I want to kiss them. And I feel horrible. This isn't fair to Livi. But I can't flip a switch and stop liking her. I've never felt like this before. How can you have everything you want and still be so miserable?
It's not fair.

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