Little Dipper

MY Boyfriend

"Soos, you are practically glowing!" Mabel said as Soos came into work.

"It's amazing, we talked for hours last night!" Soos said happily. "She's so adorable and sweet and has the cutest laugh!"

"Ah, love. It really makes life worth waking up for." Stan said, smiling at Susan picking out something across the shop.

"Guess that means you gotta break up with the A.I.." Bill remarked.

"Oh, right. Giffany." Soos looked a bit guilty.

"Hey, it wasn't meant to be. She's an A.I., you're a living flesh and blood human, she'll find someone else." Bill shrugged.

"What are you talking about?" Gideon asked.

"His A.I. girlfriend was on the TV screens at the mall yesterday. Pretty advanced for this world, I wonder who made her?" Bill looked intrigued.

"What do you mean?" Dipper asked.

"Well, an A.I. like that is really difficult to create. From what I glimpsed, she seems to be very independent of her source file. Imagine the possibilities, wow!" Bill said excitedly.

"World-takeover?" Dipper asked.

"Well, sure, I guess that too." Bill rolled his eye. "Anyways, I'll have to talk to this girl. But, in the meantime, you should really break up with her, Question Mark. And do it gently. A.I. or not, I doubt either girl wants to share."

"Worry about that after work." Stan said. "I need this shelf fixed, Soos."

"Coming!" Soos walked over to him.

–

"So....like, how do youse break up with someone? I barely know how to get someone to date me." Soos said during break.

"Uh...you do know I recently broke up with Robbie, right?" Wendy reminded him. "Look, what terms are you on with this girl...A.I....thing?"

"Oh, we get along great! It's just, well, she's an A.I.. And I like Melody." Soos chuckled nervously. "I don't know how to do this."

"Just tell it to her straight, you're human and she's an A,I,. You could never be together." Wendy shrugged.

"Wow, can you be any less tactful? Why not lock her in a closet while you're at it?" Bill asked dryly.

"Well, how would you do it?" Mabel asked him.

"Me? I wouldn't date an A.I. at all, those things are temperamental as hell." Bill shook his head. "Just tell her you like someone else. Be honest, and try to be tactful."

"I don't know how...but I have a date with Melody tonight, so I guess I better do it before I go." Soos sighed.

"Yeah, probably should." Bill nodded.

–

Soos stood in front of his computer screen, trying to figure out how to go about this. "Uh...Giffany?"

"Yes, Soos?" She asked, a smile on her face.

"Uhm...look, it's been great, but...I just...don't feel that way about you anymore. I like someone else." Soos said, glancing to the side.

"It's that meat girl, isn't it?" Giffany asked, her image glitching a bit as her smile stayed on her face. "The one you met at the mall. You're leaving me for her."

"Well...yeah." Soos nodded. "We're going on a date tonight, so I gotta...I gotta break it off with you. I don't mean to hurt you, and I hope you find someone that makes you very happy."