It's Gotta Be You (A Roc Royal love story)

Chapter 22 Four Months Big Difference

AUGUST 19th

Roc's POV

So its been about four months since I really fucked up. Ciara hasn't spoken to me since. I tried calling and texting for a while but when she didn't reply nor answer I just stopped.

I know she's in her fourth month by now and I really want to be there for my baby even if we aren't together. That doesn't mean I don't want to be together, it just means she may not want to be together.

After that day at the beach, she hasn't been at school and I wonder if she changed schools. If she did I couldn't blame her.

I wanted to get out of the house for a little bit so I left and went to the river side spot where I asked Ciara out. When I got there I surprised to find her there. She was staring out at the river and was wiping tears from her eyes.

I walked over to her and she looked at me, then looked back at the river. I guess she was determined not to move. I sat next to her and to my surprise she stayed there. It was silent as we both looked out into the river but I thought it was either now or never.

Me-Hey

Ciara-Hey

Me-How have you been?

Ciara-Do you want the lie or the truth?

Me-The truth I want to see how much I fucked up

Ciara-(scoffs) Well the day you cheated on me I told my parents I was pregnant and I tried to lie so my baby could have their father but my dad knew that it was yours so he kicked me out. I moved in with my brother, changed schools and lived life.

Me-Im so sorry Ciara I know I ruined your life and I hurt you to no end but I want to make things right. Not for me though for you and the baby

Ciara-You know the day you cheated on me I sat there and thought "Why me?" You know?

Because im nothing loyal and faithful to all my boyfriends and they just go off and cheat on me. Why is that Roc?

Me-I swear you were the most best thing that ever happened to me and I know I fucked that up but it wasn't your fault that I cheated

Ciara-Shit I wasn't blaming myself but I do want to know why?

Me-You started talking about the baby and I panicked

Ciara-But you were the one that wanted this baby

Me-I know but wanting and having are two different things and when I realized how real this was I stopped thinking for one minute and did something dumb. I never intended on hurting you

Ciara-(scoffs) They never do

Me-Ciara you have to believe me

Ciara-Lets say for argument sake that I did believe you. Where does that leave us?

Me-Well I do everything I can for my baby and we'll just be separated but civil parents for the baby

Ciara-You know Roc this is hard to say but I miss you so much and I still love you but I don't know how to be with someone who's cheated on me. I would love to be a family for our baby's sake but how do you trust someone who's cheated on you?

Me-Ciara im sorry. Im sorry I hurt you im sorry I ruined your life im sorry that I fucked everything up

Ciara-Im so tired Roc im so very tired I just want it all to stop cause I don't know how much more I can take

She put her head in knees and cried. I wanted to hold her but I knew she didn't want me to touch her.

When she looked back up she wiped her tears and stared at the river again.