If Without You • jongsang

10. 🫀

TW: anxiety/ panic attack

Yeosang POV
Yeosang flagged a taxi down and quickly got in. He watched out the window and shook his leg as he rode to Seonghwa's house. Seonghwa had a history of anxiety and panic attacks, but it hasn't happened since he broke up with his ex. Yeosang wondered what could have happened for Seonghwa to be acting this way after so many years of being fine.

As soon as the driver parked Yeosang was already out of the cab and practically running to Seonghwa's apartment. He knew the code so he quickly punched it in and walked into Seonghwa's apartment. Yunho was panicking just as much as Seonghwa since he didn't know what to do. Yeosang put all of his things on Seonghwa's counter and walked over to the older. Yunho backed away since Yeosang was there and sat on the opposite side of the couch. Yeosang kneeled down in front of Seonghwa and took a moment to examine him. Seonghwa was breathing heavily. He couldn't focus on anything and his eyes kept darting around everywhere. Yeosang frowned a little and held Seonghwa's shaking hands still. He tried to make Seonghwa look him in the eyes but it only worked for a few seconds.

"Hyung.. look at me.. what did you eat for breakfast hm?" Yeosang asked, knowing that Seonghwa was just thinking about his panic attack and had to distract him from that.

"Uh- um.. I just had.. toast.." Seonghwa mumbled. Yeosang smiled and nodded.

"That's good! Did you have coffee?" Yeosang asked. Seonghwa shook his head quickly since he knew that coffee could spark his attacks sometimes.

"Okay.. hey.. I heard your favorite artist is releasing a new album soon! Are you excited for that?" Seonghwa smiled softly and nodded. Yeosang smiled back when he felt Seonghwa's hands stop shaking so much.

"Yeah.. I'm excited.." he mumbled. Yeosang hummed and patted Seonghwa's head gently. Yeosang helped Seonghwa take deep breaths, watching the older as they both took a deep breath in, held it for a few seconds, then breathed back out. Seonghwa had calmed down and Yunho was in awe of Yeosang's skills.

"Yeo why didn't you go to college to be a psychiatrist?" He asked. Yeosang laughed softly and shrugged.

"I guess I really only know how to help Hwa hyung" Yeosang answered. Seonghwa smiled a little and hugged Yeosang tight, soon pulling away from him with wide eyes.

"Hey! Didn't you have a date or something today??" Yeosang just shook his head and sat in between Seonghwa and Yunho on the couch.

"I did, but Yunho hyung called me and I needed to help you.. besides, I'm not very happy with Jongho at the moment." Yeosang said. The other two furrowed their eyebrows with a frown.

"Why? What did he do?" Yunho asked.

"He was listening to our call this morning.. I mean.. I get it, now that I'm saying it out loud. If I saw a random guys name on his phone I would think he was talking to him." Yunho and Seonghwa smirked hearing this.

"Aweee you like Jongho!" Seonghwa said and poked Yeosangs side. Yeosang widened his eyes and blushed.

"Yeah! He obviously likes you too if he was acting all jealous and stuff!" Yunho said. Yeosang just scoffed and crossed his arms over his chest.

"And what about the whole eavesdropping thing? You two are just gonna forgive that cause we both like eachother?" Yeosang asked in disbelief. Yunho and Seonghwa both nodded in unison.

"Well.. yeah! I'm not mad about it! I'm not trying to hide my anxiety or anything!" Seonghwa said. Yeosang just sighed and nodded.

"Fine.. but I'm allowed to have at least a day to myself before I talk to him again. That wasn't right in my book." Yeosang said firmly. Yunho just rolled his eyes.

"Your so stubborn! But do whatever you want." Yunho said. Seonghwa laughed softly and shook his head, leaning back on the couch.

"Hey Hwa hyung.. how come you had a panic attack out of nowhere anyways?" Yeosang asked. Seonghwa just hummed softly and shrugged.

"I really don't know.. but you know this wasn't the first time it came out of nowhere.." Seonghwa answered. Yeosang just nodded and looked at the TV.

•~•~•~•

"Hey why aren't you at work either?" Seonghwa asked after a few minutes of all three of them watching TV.

"I woke up late.. forgot to set my alarm." Yeosang said. Seonghwa wiggled his eyebrows and Yunho smirked.

"Yeah.. forgot to set your alarm... sureeee~" Yunho teased. Yeosang rolled his eyes for the nth time and scoffed.

"If I might remind you, I'm a virgin thank you." Yeosang said, earning a laugh from the two.

"It'll come soon Yeo.. I have a feeling you really like Jongho~" Seonghwa teased. Yeosang blushed and shook his head. Yunho went to the kitchen to grab some snacks for the three of them and came back. The trio sat on the couch and just relaxed and watched movies for the rest of the day, not worrying about crushes or anxiety.

(This chapter took me a while lol.. I have anxiety problems as well and just wanted to somehow incorporate my own experience into seonghwas attack. Just a reminder this is all fake and coming solely from my own head! Thanks again for reading ❤️❤️)