"No." You instantly replied.
"Why not, I wish to help."
"It's too dangerous." You replied, eyes brimming with a warning.
"I know of the precautions, darling, I've read every step," Loki replied evenly.
"I said no."
"Stop being so stubborn! Can't you see all I want to do is help you? That all I want is for you to be happy?"
"Then stop insisting! Maybe I'll be happier! All I want is for you to be safe!" You shouted back, tone escalating.
"Can't you EVER put yourself first?" Loki replied, anger rising in him as well.
"I'm done with this." You answer, your voice edged with venom. "Don't wake me for dinner, I'm not hungry."
Loki stood there speechless, wondering where he went wrong as you stormed into bed. He paused there looking at you, before exiting to the dining hall with a click.
Meanwhile, you had buried yourself in the sheets, hoping he would join you, sit next to you, kiss your temple, even just a touch of your hair, anything at all, but the flame of hope was all but squashed after the click of the door. How could he not understand how important he was to you? You shed your first tear before closing your eyes to shut out the pain in your chest, missing the hot and cold embrace spooning you as you fell asleep.
~~~
When Loki returned later, he was exhausted physically and emotionally. Fending off worried questions about you was easy, but after turning to his right to ask if you were enjoying your food, he was shocked into a realization of how lonely he was without your familiar presence at his side.
He didn't understand how you couldn't understand how much you disvalued your life, and how much he did. How distraught he would be without you, without knowing you were alive and safe.
Caught up in his own thoughts for the rest of dinner, he missed everything, even a toast in his name. It took him downing a touch too much alcohol for him to finally even crack a smile.
Now, stumbling back into your 'shared' quarters, he drunkenly dressed himself in just his pants, his mood dampened by the thought that if you'd been with him, you would be helping him get into his clothes at the very moment, and fell onto the bed with a thump.
He tried to stay mad and stay away, after all, you didn't want to be woken, but after you let out a subconscious groan because of the heat, Loki's walls finally cracked as he cuddled you, letting his frost-giant body temperature cool you down.
And when you cuddled into him and he drew you in close, how could he not melt?
~~~
You yawned, stretching out your body in the warm sunlight, before suddenly hitting something. Well, someone.
It was Loki, and he reeked of alcohol. And his pants were on backward.
You smiled letting out a small giggle before settling back down into his arms, the slight chill comforting.
As you got out of bed to start your day an hour later, he stirred, groaning.
"You were out drinking." You say, matter-a-factly while setting down a tray of tea. Oh, how the roles have reversed.
"Obviously," Loki replied grumpily looking down at how he was dressed before collapsing back down into the bed.
"Here, have some tea."
"No."
"It'll make you feel better."
"Nothing can make me feel better except one thing."
"What's that?" You replied, smirking.
He lifted his arms up in a silent plea. "Cuddles?"
You obliged, melting into his arms, filling the gaps in both your hearts.
~~~
You felt free. The past few months had been awfully light, and the sun shining on your skin warmed you.
You almost felt guilty. Guilty for being able to grow and move away from your mother. Tears prickled at the corners of your eyes as you thought about her.
Then cold hands wrapped around your waist from behind and a kiss was placed on your cheek as he bent down so you both sat on a comfortable chair.
"Loki!"
"What are you thinking about?" He asked, taking in the expanse of your face and studying all your expressions.
"Oh, nothing much. I just hope Tony won't do something stupid in my garden and blow it up." You replied, with genuine worry.
"Always the overthinker, my love." Loki smiled, kissing your forehead.
The domesticity of your interactions was comforting. However, you wished you could say that about all the time you spent with him.
Loki was still hung up over the idea of being your tether, the person keeping you from floating away in the stream of time. Once in the most intimate moment, after your first kiss, he pulled away and remarked:
"Darling, I wish to hold you for eternity, and I would hate for you to drift away. Please allow me to be the one to hold you down forever, let me do the spell."
That ruined the perfect mood, and you were upset, to say the least. This one issue was the reason for your many fights, big bursts of fires that resolve into tiny sparks after some weightless apologies, only for the spark to flare again. It was an endless cycle of deflection.
"Darling, are you ok? You have the worry lines in between your eyebrows again." Loki said, reaching to smooth out your scrunched brows.
"I'm fine!" You say enthusiastically, smiling at him while pushing those thoughts deep down.
He frowned at you a little before settling back into comfort, both of you drowning in your own thoughts.
~~~
You were hard at work in the library, trying to find another solution to your endless life problem. Book after book after book. You even read while your body slept, doing the same thing Stephen did while at Kamar-taj. But nothing showed up.
Days after days, mornings, nights, and afternoons of little success wore down on you.
It didn't help that Loki was becoming ever more persistent about the spell. The bond.
Not only did the danger scare you, but the commitment. You two were so early in your courtship, only about three months in of pleasant Asgardian bliss. Were you both ready to really be bound together?
You sighed. The little voice in your head was whispering: "Give in......what's the worst that can happen?"
You shook your head to clear your thoughts. You wanted to visit Frigga first. Know the whole process inside and out before subjecting another to your harm. Finally having your mindset, you set off to find her.
Unbeknownst to you, Loki was just a bookshelf away. Knowing through his magic that he had worn down on you. This was the best for you. Right?
~~~
A/N: I should have tw a bit of toxicness and unhealthy relationships. But I guess you will all see it play out soon!
~Star
YOU ARE READING
Ivy Entrapped Phoenix: Loki x Fem!Reader
Fanfiction"𝓛𝕠Ｋ𝒾," You breathed out. ~~~ Y/N has met many people, eternals, wizards, avengers, gods, and more. Years and Years of life and disaster, you've seen it all. Nothing was new. When a certain man, no god, walks into your life. You encounter what...
