❀Warning❀
There will be details you might find disturbing revolving around death, blood and graphic descriptions.24 July 2020
Emersyn StylesI can't look at Harry the same knowing there's something going on that he refuses to fill me in about.
When he returned from phoning Zayn I asked him what was wrong because he looked so stressed. I stayed extremely still so he wouldn't have heard the clashing of the keys in my pocket but he assured me it wasn't anything to worry about. He told me that Zayn needed something despite him making that phone call.
It felt like every time he spoke the lies stabbed me in the chest, twisting the knife slowly until I couldn't talk it anymore.
For once I made an excuse to leave, I didn't want to be around him when he was so easily lying to my face.
I felt like crying walking away from his home with Buddy snuggled in my arms, leaving the safety of his family because now I don't know what he's doing behind my back.
Whether I'm just overthinking or not I couldn't have stayed the night like I'd originally planned, I'm scared.
I love him so much that the thought of lies being in our relationship is terrifying, I've been nothing but truthful with him. I've poured my heart out to that man, told him things I've never told anyone else yet thinking about it I know nothing about him.
The only information he's shared willingly with me is that he has an older sister called Gemma who still resides in Italy with her husband, everything else I've pieced together myself or already known.
He knows about my assault, about my parents and how they've treated not only me but Koen. He is close with my brother, his friends are my friends and my brain can't cope with the thought of him being the reason our relationship crumbles.
It should be because the stars want us apart, not that Harry's slowly destroying it.
Why would he even have keys to my basement? He hates my father, he hates my family and the business so why is he immersing himself in it? Where do those other keys go? Why didn't he say anything to me? I could've helped him get answers.
It feels like my brain is going to explode, all these unanswered questions swimming around my head trying to claw their way out but just forming a headache deep in my skull.
However there's one thing that's massively begun to overthrow any thoughts. No one should be sick like I've been for this length of time, having it come and go randomly along with aversions to certain foods and smells. I'd be ignorant not to consider the fact I could be pregnant despite being on birth control, there's always a chance but the thought is fucking terriying.
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