A day in the life (fruk)

20

1995

"The year two thousand is approaching. I heard that the technology would fail once that happened."

"Rubbish."

People, as well as nations, began freaking out about what was to come during the year two thousand. Personally, I had seen similar scares like this. People thought the world was going to end. I know all too well what comes with believing silly things like that. Mr. Japan should understand better too, but here he was, believing it.

We were sitting beside each other at the banquet being held for all the nations. It was for doing an excellent job during the past few years. Our world leaders, mainly the ones from the UN, thought it would be a good idea. However, there were many nations in the United Nations, so conversing with all, and making sure to talk to all were hard. I sat beside Mr. Japan today. We had gotten a bit closer, so it was nice to have a friend other than the boys and Francis.

"Hmm, why do you think that? Some of my people believe it."

"Many people say many things, and they are not true at times. If it were to crash down around us, there isn't anything we could do about it. People are worried for no reason. Mr. France could tell you the same thing—"

"ENGLAND!"

I felt pressure against my back, and suddenly the stress entered my body. His hair fell over my face as he leaned against me. His stubble rubbed against my forehead as I sat. He and I only acted as friends, just as he agreed to. No doubt there were still feelings there between us. However, we ignore it, as we should do. Given time, those feelings would go away.

"Ah! We were talking about you, France."

"Of course you both were; I would be surprised if you didn't."

"Shut up; you are so vain!"

"Moi? You were the one talking about me right now, I was only pointing out the facts."

He continued to mess with me, and I could only stare at Japan, annoyed. It was the nineteen nineties now. Almost one hundred years since the Entente, and somehow nothing has changed. Maybe that was a good thing? However, he was still annoying.

"Would you like to join us—"

"NO!"

"YES! THANK YOU! This seat beside England looked so lonely!"

Francis sat beside me, and I slapped my forehead a bit. What was up with him? We hardly talked socially and mostly messed with each other. However, right now, I am trying to be around other people. He could at least try and read the room. I know I have been difficult with my feelings, but he could make it easier on me.

"Now, what were you both talking about?" He asked. Japan smiled at him, and I didn't do much. I only looked at my drink, feeling uninterested. "Do you have to be here? I'm trying to be alone with Japan!"

"Ah, don't make it sound so personal; he is welcome!"

"England? You want to be alone with him?" He asked. Francis placed a hand on my thigh, and I immediately got shivers. Being around him gave me many mixed emotions. I would feel depressed, which I was dealing with in my own way. I would feel confused or happy sometimes. I would even feel jealous because of the type of person he was. He was able to get everyone's attention in the room.

However, right now.

Right as he placed his hand on my thigh, I felt this tingling sensation in my stomach. It made me nervous and all types of anxious. Of course, I know I have feelings for him, and this isn't the first time he has invaded my personal space.

It was still different.

I tensed up and looked at him with a stunned expression. At least, I'd like to think I looked stunned and not absolutely horrified by the feeling I got.

Since the Cold War ended, and before this banquet was announced. I had started to realize that his presence was overwhelming in a sense of not being able to control my feelings. It was as if I was beginning to explode.

Like unaddressed sexual tension.

I mean...that would be insane.

Right?

"Yes, please leave us!"

I snatched my leg away from him and saw that he had noticed. He looked ticked off but didn't say anything against it. Why would he, anyway? He knew better.

Yes, we didn't talk much about anything specific during the past few years. Now, I was only trying to shake off my feelings for him. I realize how frustrating it can be for all parties involved, but I didn't care. The boys needed to get over it, and they were. Slowly.

They stopped trying to play matchmaker, and I think it was for the best. Francis and I won't feel like everything is forced. That was the worst part. Feeling their hands pushing us together, was awkward enough. It felt terrible and unnatural. I feel that if we were to find each other in that sense somehow, I'd want to do it on my own. Not dealing with anyone pulling the strings.

However, they stopped.

And we...

Could go the route that is for the best. The route where we forget everything because that is the smart decision. Or...

We could go toward the unspoken route. Yes, this route we both want, and it would be amazing and would feel amazing, but it was really bad. Forbidden!

Only time will tell.

I had questioned my religion in the past because of him. Leading to me ultimately not caring for it any longer. I have done terrible things for his sake. But I can't anymore! I can't!

I shouldn't be thinking about this anymore!

"Hmmm? Why so hostile? I only wanted to see what you both were talking about!" He whined. Francis came closer to me, and I felt my head getting hot. He was absolutely stunning in every way possible. It was driving me crazy.

What am I supposed to do with myself?

"Well, I...want to make friends!" I declared. Francis came closer, and Japan noticed how...unwell, I looked. He gave me a concerned look that screamed it. "Hmm? Your face is really red, are you okay?" He asked. Francis was about to reach for my head, but I stood up quickly.

"YUP! I AM! I am quite fine, thank you. Now, if you excuse me, I'm going to get a drink!" I spoke. I sounded a bit like a robot, but it was the best I could do when trying to act natural. He looked at me a bit confused as I rushed away from him.

I was confused too.

I didn't understand why my body was betraying me.

I wasn't a teenage boy who couldn't handle his emotions! I am an adult!

Yet!

Now!

Now of all places!

Why has it taken this long for me to feel impatient? I know what was going on. My brain is trying to forget, but my body and heart were trying to convince me to make the moves on Francis.

I wasn't!

I was too much of a Pansy.

Also, I can't!

I won't!

I am going to enjoy the rest of this banquet. I won't let myself keep falling for his charms. Especially after I continuously tell myself I will stop.

I suppose I was more head over heels than I anticipated.

He was the enemy....an enemy that was winning this battle.

Welcome to the part about why I fight myself on my feeling twenty-four-seven.