copulation b.e imagines

ᴍᴇᴍᴏʀɪᴇꜱ

this story is based off the song above, recommended to listen to the song while reading.

Rain swept the door as Billie was going through old photos of her relationship, she had a glass of white wine while she slowly sipped the delicacy looking back at memories.

It had been a couple months. Billie though a couple of months would've been enough time for her to stop crying as she went through the picture sending small smiles at the photobook. 

When Maggie and Billie had broken up, Billie refused to even look at her gallery without crying. The fact she was actually smiling at the pictures was improvement she had overcome the fact that she was never going to see Maggie again and that it was time to move on. 

It was rather late as the someone knocked on the door and ranged the doorbell. "Who is it?" a slurred voice replied. "It's mebi lz" familiar voice came from the door. 

Billie opened the door and was met with the same brown eyes at the door entrance that broke her heart she remembered it all too well. 

"What are you doing here?" Billie replied. "You're going to let me stand in the rain?" Billie stepped back as Maggie walked in. 

"I just want to talk to you" Billie knew she had come so far in her healing process that a talk could destroy her, but she couldn't turn away now. 

She hoped Maggie wouldn't ruin this process and make it harder than it already was she broke it off with the girl as if she wasn't trying to get over it. 

Sometime Billie just wished she could keep Maggie in her memories a more positive intake of all the happy moments in their relationship instead of looking at the drunken mess in her kitchen rolled up like a baby clutching her stomach. 

Maggie started crying and explain her side of the story rather than just stating she was an addict who relied on sex and couldn't settle down. She was playing victim non the less which was something her therapist taught her. 

If Billie could believe it, she was being gaslit. Billie knew she couldn't say goodbye between the feelings her and Maggie once shared and the memories she was beyond collapsing and letting her walls down when it came to the woman. 

"Maggie why are you doing this? Why are you here dammit." Billie said tears spilling out her eyes. 

"I'm trying to move on and you're not letting me, look at yourself you're drunk in my kitchen for fucks sake." Billie replied. 

Billie knew she couldn't say goodbye Maggie wasn't leaving she was in no shape to leave especially at this time of hour. 

"Get the fuck up" Billie replied as Maggie stumbled to her bedroom. 

two weeks later 

On and off sex Billie knew what she was getting into another heartbreak. Something about the raven-haired girl always intoxicated Billie no matter how bad the girl could do to her she would always run back to her. 

Billie knew she couldn't be Maggie's friend of lover; she knew they were holding each other back from moving on and falling in love with other people. 

She knew it was hard to find an end for something that just kept happening over and over again. Billie knew the ending was always going to result in the same way her crying, not eating and probably going back into depression. 

Maggie knew it too. She didn't love Billie no matter how intimate they were she felt no feelings for the blonde no matter what Billie would risk her life for Maggie but deep-down Maggie would never do the same. 

Maggie only loved herself and sex and that's all Billie had to offer. Maggie didn't care about anyone and sadly she often hurt other feelings with this ultimatum. 

"Maggie wake up." Billie replied. "What?" Maggie said pulling the blanket back over herself. 

"I can't do this shit Maggie." Billie replied. "Do what?" Maggie replied rubbing her eyes. 

"Your so blindsided to your problems, you need help I can't catch feelings when you don't feel the same. I can't go back to loving you knowing you don't feel a milligram of love for me." Billie responded throwing a bag on the ground. 

Maggie chuckled. "What do you want me to do with this?" Maggie asked. "I don't know find somewhere else to go." Billie responded.

Maggie packed her clothes and books as she tossed everything in her bag. She took advantage of Billie again. This time Billie wasn't going to cry or starve herself she had grew from that. 

Maggie didn't even feel sorry for what she put Billie through the past two weeks. She took advantage of her body, her mind, her kindness, Billie offered everything to the woman because she loved the woman. 

Sadly, the woman didn't love her. Maggie walked out the room to the door. "I guess this is goodbye?" Maggie replied. 

"I can't keep doing this sometimes I wish you would just stay in my memories." Billie responded. "Only the good ones though." Maggie whispered. 

"Yeah, only the good ones." Billie sent a weak smile before closing the door. 

She lit her fireplace and wrapped up in a blanket going through all the photos she had recently taken out her box. Majority of the pictures being sentimental towards a specific Raven-hair girl. 

Billie knew to get over someone she had to erase them. She was obviously never good at forgetting them. 

She was so weakened by Maggie and always gave in. Billie wanted it to stop she took the pictures out the box and tossed them into the fire as it crackled. 

Tears slipped down her eyes. Love was a dangerous game to play she took two steps forward just to take three back. 

She gave into a spell that was casted on her for life. All the blonde wanted was for Maggie to change but she knew that happening was like asking a newborn baby to run. 

Billie looked at the cologne she bought Maggie while they were dating and tossed it out in the trash. 

Everything was clear of her. She was putting Maggie in the past because she was traumatized. 

She was barely surviving, but her memories would stay in her memories no matter what she did to forget the woman. 

April 23rd, 2023

1066 words