Silent Voices (Agere Shinsou)

Chapter 11

hitoshi's pov
we pulled into the parking lot of the resturant and we got out, we walked inside and we found a table and we sat down i sat next to shota and hizashi sat next to his dad.
a waitress came over and asked what we wanted to drink, i tapped shota and i pointed to lemonade on the menu, he nodded and told her what i wanted.
i looked over the menu not really feeling up to meats today.
do you want what you want to eat hitoshi? shota asked.
i nodded and he watched as i pointed out the veggie broth, veggie toppings and some shrimp and fish on the side, he nodded and handed me a stim toy to help with my anxiety.
hitoshi did you have a good first day? iro asked
i just nodded
well did you make any friends yet? he asked
um kind of i dont know if we are friends or not but we talked a lot we played video games last night neither of us could sleep so we hopped into the games chat room and we hung out a bit during the day, i signed
well thats good im glad you have some one in your class you can talk to, iro said
i just nodded.
soon our food came and we all ate and talked for a while i finished about 3/4th of my soup and half my protein but i think i did really good.
i tapped shota again and he looked at me, i pointed to my food and he smiled, you did really good hitoshi im proud of you bud, he said as he softly ruffled my hair.
i picked up my stim toy and i started playing with it as i tried to drown out the loud noises of the other families talking around us.
i couldnt drown them out completely and i was starting to feel like i was slipping again but i didnt want to i wanted to spend time with them and stay big the whole time but its not working.
i leaned over and i rested my head on shota's shoulder he looked down at me, you feeling small bud? he asked
i just nodded as i slipped my thumb into my mouth and i chewed on my fingernail.
okay once we finish we can go, do you maybe want to try a desert today? he asked
i shrugged.
do you want to look at the desert menu or share something? he asked
i sh-sha-share, i stuttered.
good job toshi that was your first time vocalizing in public. he said with a smile.
he grabbed the desert menu and held it so we could both see it, okay so what looks good there there are fried oreo dumplings, chocolate cake, fresh fruit with honey or cream, they have different options of ice cream look they have a triple berry, a plain vanilla, a strawberry, a cookies and cream, and even a mango. he said as he pointed at the list.
i looked it over and i pointed to the vanilla ice cream and a side of mixed fruit.
you want 2 deserts? he asked
i-if i n-no like i cr-cre-cream i l-like fr-fruit. i stuttered out.
he looked shocked but had a big smile.
YOU SPOKE A WHOLE SENTENCE, he said excitedly, he pulled me close and hugged me tightly.
i smiled and i hugged him back and i stayed there just feeling safe and relaxed in his arms.
he rubbed my back softly and i sat back up.
the waitress came back over and asked if we wanted desert, he said yes and they all ordered what they wanted and he ordered for me.
i-- is --feel-- small i said softly.
okay buddy good job telling me that do you want to stay and try desert or get it to go and eat it at home? he asked.
stay pwease. i said.
you can lean on me if you need to, he said.
i grabbed my stim toy and i laid my head on his shoulder again as i played with my toy.
soon desert came and the bowls were sat in front of us.
i grabbed the spoon and i scooped up a small amount of the ice cream and i looked at shota
its okay bud try some its okay if you dont like it, he said sweetly.
i was a little scared so i put ou rmy hand asking for him to hold it, he grabbed my hand and he rubbed my hand with his thumb to help my nerves, i took a bite and i put the spoon down and i shook my head no as i grimiced.
you dont like it? he asked
t-too c-cold me no like, i said trying to sound big.
okay thats okay you can eat the fruit, he said
i picked through the fruit eating all the melon pieces and the strawberries.
once i flished i started feeling agitated and overwhelmed.
i couldnt sit still i felt like i had to be moving so i started rocking myself softly to make it look as discreet as possible.
hey bud we are all done are ready to go home? shtoa asked
i nodded and he helped me out of my chair and iro put the money on the table and shota grabbed my hand to make sure i didnt wander offas we walked out and we got back in the car and we started our drive home, shota sat in the back seat with me and let me lay down and lay my head in his lap as i played with his fingers. you doing okay little one? hizashi asked me from the front seat.
mhmmhm i mumbled.
he looked at me from the mirror and smiled.
we pulled into the drive way and shota helped me out and took me up to the house.
he unlocked the door but before opening it he turned me to face him.
can you go upstairs to your room and get comfy clothes layed out then go take a shower or a bath and i will come in and help you get ready for the night, he said.
i nodded happily and he opened the door and i went in and i went right up the stairs to my room i picked out my panda feetie jammies and i laid them on the bed and i grabbed my panda paci with the matching clip, and my stuffied kitty, i sat them next to my jammies.
i went to the bathroom and i turned on the shower and i took off my clothes and i climbed into the warm stream of water.
i washed my face and my body before turning off the shower and allowing myself to slip completely as i wrapped my towel around my body and i went back to my room. i got dressed into my panda jammies and i clipped my paci to my jammies and i grabbed my kitty and i went back downstairs i climbed onto the couch and i rested my head on shota's lap hey little one you okay? he asked me
i giggled and i nodded.
thats good buddy here why dont i put on a show for you and we can cuddle till its time for bed, he offered.
he turned on the tv and he went to the kids section and he slowly scrolled through the shows till i saw care bears.i pointed at it and he nodded he clicked it and he sat the remote down and i cuddled up to him as he softly ran his fingers through my hair helping me feel more relaxed.
he seems to have warmed up to you a lot since he started living with you last time i was here you two didnt do this. iro said
yeah he uh hes warmed up to me a lot since he came to live with us hes more affectionate with me then he is hizashi but he does still ask him for hugs and they do story time together, they play together but he hasnt asked him to cuddle like this yet, i think hizashi is just a little too loud at times and sometimes it overwhelms him but they do spend a lot of time together. shota said.
it was quiet for a while till i heard iro speak up.
oh my goodness hitoshi i completely forgot i have a gift for you in the car, iro said as he got up and he walked out of the house, i watched him from the window and he pulled a gift bag out of the back seat and he came back inside.
i sat up and he handed it to me, this is just a little gift that says im proud of you for your acomplishment of getting into UA, he said.
i opened it and i i saw there was a new stuffie inside.
i pulled it out and i saw it was a panda it was a medium size so it was pretty big compared to some of m other ones.
i- um we- we ma-mat. i said stuttering
are you trying to say you match? shota said.
ch-ch, i repeated.
yeah buddy just like that, he said.
ma- at- ch- i sounded out.
we- ma- at- ch, i said slowly.
yes buddy so good you got it good job, shota said happily.
whats goin on why the high praise? i heard hizashi ask coming down the stairs.
he finally got the ch sound hes been working on for the last month and it was all cause your dad brought him a stuffed panda and he said that they matched cause his feeties. shota said happily.
can you say it again for me so i can hear, hizashi asked.
we is- ma-at-ch we is pan-da, i said softly and slowly
oh good job little one im so proud of you, he said as he ruffled my hair.
i put my arms out and made grabby hands.
what do you want up or hug? he asked
i is wan h-hug p-pwe-pwease, i said
he leaned down and he hugged me.
your doing so good with your talking today we are so very proud of you, you have come so far since we adopted you, he said happily.
i let go of the hug and i laid back down on shota lap and i hugged my new friend as i put my paci back in my mouth and i went back to watching carebears. boe came down from my room and he came over and stoop up and put his paws on the couch to see me.
i reached over and i pet him, he nuzzled my hand and he got down and he curled up on the floor below me.
zashi got up and he went to the kitchen and i could hear glass bottles clanging together and the sound of the fridge and freezer opening and closing.
soon he came back and he handed me a sippy cup and he handed shota a glass cup with an amber brown liquid in it.
he went back to the kitchen and came back with two more drinks that had fruit in them and looked bubly he handed one to iro and he sat down with the other one.
i looked at zashi and i whined to get his attention he looked at me and i pointed to his cup.
no buddy im sorry this is an adult drink your far to small to have this you have to wait till your at least 18 to drink in this house, he said.
i pouted but i accepted the answer and i laid back down as they all talked but i just watched carebears, the time ticked by and soon iro was leaving and it was time for bed.
but again i wasnt sleepy at all.
hizashi helped me up to my room and he laid me down and he got some of my books and he sat down and i moved around so i could see the book, i rested my head on his knee as i held his hand just craving phsical touch today, he started reading the books as i looked at all the pictures.
after an hour he finished all the books and tucked me in and turned off my light.
i waited till i heard him back downstairs and i got up out of bed and i turned on the light and pulled out my play mat.
i played with my legos for a few hours till i saw it was 2am.
i started to feel big again so i got up and i grabbed my phone and i laid on my bed and i opened call of duty again to see if anyone was online.
and to my surprise bakugou was online again.
i went to the chat and i saw he was typing.
B- hey surprised to see you awake at 2am
H- yeah i have insomnia i only sleep a couple nights a week or a couple hours a night why arnt you sleeping
B- its nothing its just kinda loud in my house right now i cant really sleep
H- its 2 am why is your house loud?
B- my parents are fighting again, and as always they are fighting about me but i dont want to get into that right now.
we played call of duty together talking in the chat for hours neither of us sleeping, i am gonna have to talk to shota and hizashi about him cause thats not healthy.
my alarm went off so i got up and i went to the bathroom and i brushed my teeth and washed my face.
i went back to my room and i got dressed i grabbed my phone and i went downstairs where i saw both my dads sitting at the table.
i went over and i got myself a cup of coffee and i sat down.
hey i need to show you something, i typed out and i hit play.
whats up? shota asked
i went back to the game chat and i showed him the chat from last night, he read it over then he looked a little confused.
who is this and why did they share all this with you? he asked
i took my phone back and went back to my text to talk app.
its bakugou from class, i said
what oh god okay thanks for showing me this, its only the second day of school and i already have to talk to a kid, he said
he doesnt know you showed me this does he? he asked
i just shook my head.
okay so i would have no way to bring this up to him with out outing you as my kid, he said
maybe wait a few hours then pull him aside and say you noticed how exhausted he is. i suggested
not a bad idea kid ill talk to nezu first when we get there see if he knows anything about the family that i should know, he said.
i nodded as i finished my coffee and i grabbed an apple and hizashi finished washing the dishes and we grabbed our bags and we left the house and we climbed in the car and we headed to school.
we got inside and i saw bakugou and midoriya already here midoriya was sitting on bakugou's desk and bakugou was laying his head in his lap as midoriya ran his fingers through his hair, he looked like he was about to fall asleep.
i walked over to them and i sat next to them,
oh hey shinsou it was nice chatting with you in chat last night i dont really have anyone who is awake at 2am to talk to when i cant sleep so i appreciate it but i wont be online for a few days im gonna spend the rest of the week at deku's house. he said
midoriya hit him lightly on the back of the head.
sorry im spending the rest of the week with izuku, he said and looked up at midoriya, im just so used to calling you deku and im so used to you calling me kacchan, he said.
well we can still use those but not every single time we adress each other, izuku said
i smiled a bit their relationship is very sweet.
i pulled out my phone and i opened snapchat and i opened bakugou's chat.
how long have you known each other?i typed and hit send
his phone buzzed in his pocket and he pulled it out and i saw him read my message.
oh god i forgot about that, izu so shinsou doesnt talk okay he mostly communicates through a notebook or through a text to talk app on his phone, bakugou explained.
oh um how come if you dont mind me asking? midoriya asked
um im not really comfortable giving all those details but i will say its trauma related i havent talked properly since i was 5 and i was recently adopted and they are helping me get my voice back, i typed out for them to hear.
thats understandable sorry for asking, midoriya said.
  but to answer your question we have known each other since we were 4 and have been dating for a month, bakugou said.
i smiled softly at that.
i got up and i moved over to my seat and i sat down as midoriya did the same as the rest of the class started to trickle in slowly.
the lession started and i was tired so i didnt even pay attention i just zoned out