TWINEMY (Hyunjin FF)

((17))

~ Felix ~

When we got off the bus at my stop, I felt suddenly self-conscious. My neighborhood wasn't the nicest.

We were still holding hands as we walked down the road to my apartment. I didn't realize at first that we were passing Baker Street, but it didn't take too long. I had been so preoccupied with our conversation that I walked right down the street.

I turned around, questioning the shattering sound I heard. That's when I recognized the house and noticed where I was. My breath caught in my throat and I every instinct in my body told me to run.

There was a man on his porch, glass bottles around his chair. One bottle was on his lawn, now shattered because his lawn is so crusty and dead that it's basically concrete. Had he the thrown it at us?

I sped up my steps a bit and Hyunjin looked at me worriedly. "Felix?"

I couldn't respond. I was too scared. We need to leave fast. I walked even quicker. Hyunjin stopped still and that, in turn, pulled me to a stop as well. I turned to him with bugged-out eyes. What's he doing!?

"What's wrong?"

"We need to get out of here. Now!" I whisper-yelled. I held on tighter to his hand and got a move on it. He didn't say anything, just follow me blindly. We were almost at the end of the street. Unfortunately, the end is the most dangerous part.

Picture the most violently homophobic, transphobic, racist teenager that beats the shit out of people. He's there. And he knows me. And I know him. And he'll kill me if he's outside and sees me. Especially holding Hyunjin's hand.

I'm genuinely running at the point I hear my name called. My deadname. I don't look. Just run. Until I'm knocked down.

My breath is knocked out and I have momentarily blurry vision until I see him. He's towering over me before he pulls me up to stand.

He scoffs. "It's you. Been a while. Who's this?"

Now I'm scared shitless for Hyunjin. I never should have taken him here.

"What the fuck? Can you not apologize for shoving him!?" Hyunjin wraps his arm around mine. It doesn't do anything to make me feel safer.

A chuckle. Sour chuckle. He reaches out to grab Hyunjin's clothing and rips him a step closer. "You the new bitch?"

"Excuse you! Let go of me!" He tries to pull away. I want to help somehow, but I can't. I'm frozen in fear.

"Dirty fag!" The guy fills his hand with a handful of my friend's hair and pushes him to hit the ground. I jump to help Hyunjin, finally.

We both stand up and our hands are connected again, mine shaking violently. I start running without a second thought and Hyunjin nearly trips behind me. He doesn't, though, and we keep running all the way until we reach my apartment.

We only pause long enough to open the door and then we run up the stairs. I unlock the apartment and we dash in, slamming and locking the door behind us.

I collapsed to the ground in exhaustion and terror. Tears made their way down my face and my whole body shook uncontrollably. The room felt so cold.

I couldn't forget Hyunjin was in the room. I knew he was looking at me, out of breath, since I heard wheezing. Then, I felt his long arms wrap around me and his head rest in the crook of my neck.

Breathing slowly came back to me, and I wrapped my arms around Hyunjin. The faint desire to lift his head and gratefully kiss him burned lowly in my stomach, but I ignored it. Not the time.

"Hyunjin." My voice was weak.

He hummed in response, tightening his hold on me.

I pulled away and leaned back on the wall. Our eyes met and his didn't even look confused. As if whatever happened was okay and not my fault. As if my reaction is okay.

"Hyunjin.."

He nodded and reached his hand out to intertwine our fingers, rubbing his thumb against the dry skin on the back of my hand. Maybe he thinks it's gross that I have eczema. It is gross.

"Sorry. It's just... That street is really dangerous. And that guy.. He's super violent. He's beaten the shit out of me before, so I really had to get us out of there. I'm really sorry for walking down there in the first place. It's the quick route that I used to take and I forgot and went on autopilot."

He shook his head and scooted closer so that his legs were rested on mine. "Don't be sorry. It's okay. We're safe now. It's okay."

Then I remembered the guy pulling Hyunjin's hair and I sat up on my knees to cradle his head. I rested my cheek on top of his hair which was messy now. "He pulled your hair."

"Oh.. Yeah. It's fine, though. Sam's done it before so I'm used to it and it doesn't hurt as much."

I kissed the top of his head, leaving my lips there for a second and then pulled away to look at him in the eyes. My hands were still holding his face.

The air felt a bit odd. Thicker.

I pushed through it and set my lips on his. I don't know why. I just wanted to, like every cell in my body desperately needed our lips to be together and for us to be close, on another level.

I felt his posture falter and then he held himself back up for us to continue the kiss. He moved his lips against mine and I reciprocated the movement. It didn't last long, but when I pulled away, I practically jumped to set my head against his chest and hug him, breathing deeply.

His hands were on my back, rubbing the fabric of my shirt in circles as he held me against him with a comfortable pressure.

I was crying again. I don't know why. I don't know anything right now. Not sobbing, but tears were quietly sliding onto his shirt. He could definitely feel it, he just didn't mention it.