Baudelaires and a White

Chapter Nine

"Costume test!" yelled Count Olaf. "For Violet, for Klaus, for Rowan."

They were excused from the tower to get dressed in the bathroom. Klaus got dressed first - his costume was a white-and-blue striped jumper with black shirts and a white sailor's hat. Rowan came out - his costume was a long black coat, long jeans, and a pirate hat. Finally, Violet came out in a ridiculous, long white dress with flowers in her hair.

"Come on, orphans!" Count Olaf called.

Behind the scenes was very interesting, with lots of mechanical devices and people bustling around.

"I am so nervous." Justice Strauss said.

"Me too," said Violet.

Suddenly, it was scene four - the marriage. Violet, Klaus, and Rowan got on stage, and so did Justice Strauss.

Violet stood opposite Count Olaf and saw Mr. and Mrs. Poe in the audience. They smiled at her and she gave a small, reluctant smile back.

Justice Strauss gave a long speech, and then Count Olaf signed the certificate. Violet took it and signed with her left hand.

"This whole play was a trick." Count Olaf smiled.

The audience gasped.

"I, the handsome actor Count Olaf, and this girl, Violet Baudelaire, are now legally married, and her great fortune is mine!" He picked up his walkie-talkie. "It went well. Sadly, I must ask you to get the baby down. Safely. Yes."

Klaus and Rowan grinned.

"This is not okay!" yelled Mr. Poe. "I will not have it! This is illegal! As a banker and as Vice President of Orphan Affairs, I strongly object!"

"I'm sorry Baudelaires, and Rowan too." Justice Strauss said sadly. "I have failed you."

"Klaus, Orphan Boy," piped up Mr. Poe. "Why on Earth are you grinning?"

"Count Olaf is not Violet's husband." Rowan stated.

"Don't be silly, orphan." said Mr. Poe.

"I'm sorry, Rowan." said Justice Strauss. "But it's true."

"No." Klaus shook his head. "Violet signed with her left hand. Her standard hand is her right. Legal documents state that the bride must sign with her leading hand."

"Sunny!" yelled Violet. Sunny was being brought onto stage in her bird cage. Klaus opened the cage and Violet picked her up.

"Casarse?" asked Sunny, which meant 'Did you marry Olaf?'.

"No, Sunny," said Violet.

"Well," said Justice Strauss thoughtfully. "Count Olaf is a vile, terrible man, and Klaus is correct. Violet must sign with her right hand to make the marriage legal. However, as a judge, I do need proof, Violet, that you signed the certificate with your left hand."

Some behind-the-scenes workers brought over a blackboard and chalk.

On the left side, Violet wrote her signature - Violet B. - with her left hand, and then on the right side with her right hand.

Justice Strauss compared the signatures to the document and smiled. "Violet did indeed sign with her left hand. This marriage is declared invalid."

Mr. Poe let out a big whoop from the crowd, Klaus gave Violet a quick hug, and Rowan smiled. Count Olaf did not look pleased.

Suddenly, the lights switched off. There were gasps and even shouts from the audience. Count Olaf leaned in close to Violet and whispered, "I will get your fortune if it is the last thing I do. Then, I will get rid of you and your blasted siblings before you can say money."

He walked off somewhere and Violet assumed that he was saying almost the same thing to Rowan.

Violet, confused, bewildered, and scared, wondered where Count Olaf was and what he was doing. Finally, a member in the audience had the sense to get up and switch the light back on.

The stage was deadly silent, and completely empty apart from Violet, Klaus, Sunny, Rowan, Justice Strauss, Sunny's cage, and Justice Strauss's desk.

"Count Olaf?" called Rowan at last.

Klaus immediately rushed backstage. He came out looking scared. "They're not there. Count Olaf and his troupe have escaped."

"Count Olaf and his troupe have escaped!" yelled Mr. Poe from the audience, as if he had just discovered this himself. "Somebody catch that man at once."

"It's too late!" Rowan shouted.

"Mr. Poe, please call the police!"

The children couldn't help but roll their eyes as Mr. Poe did no such thing. Instead, he walked up to the front of the stage and frowned. "I am so, so sorry, Baudelaires." Mr. Poe said. "I did not realise that Count Olaf would be such a vile and despicable man. 'Vile' means 'disgusting', and despicable means 'cruel'."

"We know what the words vile and despicable mean." Klaus said, frustrated.

"Good." Mr. Poe smiled. "You children should have complained to me."

"We did." Klaus pointed out. "We came to the bank only a few days ago."

"Children." Justice Strauss exclaimed, a much more sincere apology. "I failed you. I should have called the police as soon as Count Olaf revealed his plan, but I took matters into my own hands... and failed."

Sunny began uttering some baby talk, which meant, 'You put Rowan, my siblings, and I in terrible danger, but you didn't mean to and we forgive you."

Violet nodded. "She forgives you, as do I."

"I also forgive you." said Rowan, and Klaus nodded.

"I think it is time we find you a suitable guardian!" exclaimed Mr. Poe.

Instantly, all four children said, "Justice Strauss!" (Sunny saying it in her way), and Justice Strauss looked thrilled.

"I'm sorry, children." murmured Mr. Poe, and their faces fell. "Justice Strauss is of no relation to you. Your parents really wanted you to be raised by a different guardian. Don't you want to respect your parents' wishes, Baudelaires?"

Klaus and Violet glanced at each other, and sighed sadly.

"Yes, Mr. Poe." said Violet at last. "We want to respect our parents' wishes."

"Then you shall go to live with Dr. Montgomery." announced Mr. Poe.

"Dr. Montgomery?" Klaus repeated. "We have never heard of anyone named Dr. Montgomery."

"He is your father's cousin's wife's brother." said Mr. Poe. "Rowan, you will go too."

Klaus glanced at Violet.

"Another one of our relatives." whispered Klaus.

"That we've never met." added Violet.