YouTuber One-Shots

I don't want to lose control

Warnings- Death, Sad, Anxiety Attack/Breakdown

Main characters- Ethan, Mark, Tyler and Seán

It will start in Ethan's Pov then switch to Marks then back to Ethan's!

Today was my birthday and I asked Mark if we could go see a movie tonight with him and he said yes! So I was getting ready as I slipped on some black skinny jeans and my blue converse and my Unus Annus hoodie as I fixed up my hair a little bit. I hear a knock on my door and I grab my wallet running downstairs and I open the door to see Mark. My Mark. He smiles at me "You ok?" I noticed I zoned out and I nod with a smile "Yea! Let's go or we will be late" i grab his hand as we run to the car and he gets in the drivers seat driving to the theater. We sat talking on the way there and as we pulled in I feel him take my hand. "Ethan..I need to talk to you.." I could feel my heart start to pound as he says that. "Did I do something wrong?.." Mark squeezed my hand tightly "No of course not! It's just..we've know each other for awhile now so..I figured it's about time to tell you that I like you...like- like like you" I feel my face heat up as I look away embarrassed and I feel him grab my chin and make me look at him his chocolate brown eyes piercing mine. "I understand if you don't feel the same way ok?" I suddenly found my voice and I put a hand on his cheek. "Of course I do! I always have.." I lay my forehead against his and close my eyes. We sit there in silence for a bit before Mark pulls away "We gotta go or we are gonna miss the movie love" I nod and we get out and he takes my hand as we walk through the parking lot towards the building. I'm not sure how it happened. It all happened to quickly. First I hear the shot. Then I hear him scream in pain. His hand slips from mine as I turn and see him fall to the sidewalk the blood flowing from his chest. My heart is pounding in my ears. You know in movies when everything goes in slow motion? That's exactly what's going on. I drop to my knees next to Mark and pull his head on my lap seeing him cough "Mark! Oh my god I'm so sorry!" I see him try and smile and he shakes his head "No Ethan, don't be sorry" he puts his hand to my face and wipes some tears I didn't know that were falling, I was to focused on him. I put my hand over his as someone near by calls 911. "Ethan...kiss me" I cry a little and lean down pressing my lips against his and we share a sweet passionate kiss until I pull away "I love you Ethan..." then he was gone. His hand fell limp to his side and his eyes closed. "I love you too Mark..."

I was on the drive to Ethan's house to take him to the movies for his birthday, my plan was to also tell him that I like him. I have been waiting so long to do this and I feel today would be the perfect day. I arrive at his house and go up to the door knocking, after a few seconds I hear footsteps pounding on the steps and then the door opens revealing him. My Blue Boy. I see him just standing there and I chuckle "You ok?" He nods and takes my hand "Yea, let's go or we are gonna be late!" He drags me to the car and I get in driving to the theater. We talk on our way there and as I was parking I take Ethan's hand starting to speak. "Ethan...I need to talk to you" my heart starts racing as he looks at me "Did I do something wrong?..." I frown and squeeze his hand "No of course not! It's just...we've know each other for awhile now so...I figured it's time to tell you that I like you...like- like like you" I see his face get red and he looks away and I smile a bit grabbing his chin to make him look at me "I understand if you don't feel the same way ok?" He puts a hand on my cheek and says the words I've been dying to hear "Of course I do! I always have..." he lays his forehead against mine and I close my eyes smiling a bit we sit there in silence for a bit before I pull away "We gotta go or we are gonna miss the movie love" I see him nod as we get out and start making our way inside. I take a hold of his hand as we walk through the parking lot towards the building but suddenly I hear a noise then a sharp pain in my chest. I think I screamed? But I couldn't really hear anything but the ringing in my ears as my hand slips free from Ethan's as I fall to the sidewalk the blood flowing from the hole in my chest. Is this it? Is this how I die? I don't want to die yet.. Ethan takes my head in his hands as I cough some blood coming up with it. That can't be good- "Mark! Oh my god I'm so sorry!" Why is he apologizing? I smile, or at least I think I did. "No Ethan, don't be sorry" I reach up and wipe some tears that's were falling from his face, he puts his hand over mine to keep it there. At this point I was struggling to breath "Ethan...kiss me" he leans down and kisses me. I could taste the saltiness of his tears as we kiss but I didn't care. He pulls away and I smile a bit "I love you Ethan...." Then everything went dark. This is what death feels like? A void of nothingness? I'll miss Ethan...

Its been four weeks since Mark was murdered, they said the shooter was aiming for someone else and Mark just so happened to get caught in the crossfire. The guy was thankfully arrested and today was the funeral. Seán and Tyler came to pick me up and take me. I walk out to the car seeming happy to everybody around me. Or at least- happier then two weeks ago. We drive to burial site and get out sitting in a tent like area where we see Marks casket open. I didn't cry surprisingly as I walked up to him and I touched his face, he was cold..as to be expected. I kiss his cheek "I love you so much Mark.." I sit in a chair in between Tyler and Seán as the service starts. The guy reads off things about Mark but I wasn't really paying attention as I was thinking about Mark and all of our times together then we prayed which I haven't done for a long time. They lower his casket and that's when it hits me harder then a freight train, Mark. MY Mark. Isn't coming back to me. I run towards his casket causing them to stop as I break down into broken sobs "Im so sorry I couldn't save you Mark! Why couldn't they have taken me instead?!" I say in between sobs as I feel Seán pick me up and toss me over his back "No please! I can't leave him he's all alone! Please!" I cry and hit Seáns back but not hard enough to actually hurt him. Once we were almost to the car he holds me bridal style as I have a panic attack. He runs his fingers through my hair "I know Ethan..you need to breath hon..." I lay my head on his chest trying to match my breathing with his and soon I was calm and just clinging to him like my life depended on it. He started to put me down but I grabbed his shirt "Please don't leave me too..." I could see him frown "Ethan love I'm not leaving, I was just going to put you in the car ok?" I think for a second "Can you sit with me?" He smiles and nods "Of course" he sits me in the back seat and he climbs in the back with me and holds me close "You'll be ok love, I'll always be here for you ok?" I nod and smile as he hums me a lullaby and I fall asleep in his arms. I'll always love and miss Mark but Seán promised he wouldn't leave me so I'll settle for him.